I previously read a post for the 10 reasons we have malaise in the market. None are in sync with what I found out in the check out line at Publix this morning. The REAL reasons:
1) Fear that the rumors of a carnivorous Eastern Lake Ness Monster are true
2) Fear of errant cluster bombs from Eglin obliterating entire South Walton neighborhoods
3) Dreading the possibility of a Biloxi casino barge breaking loose during the next BIG ONE and becoming permanently lodged in the dunes at Blue Mountain Beach
4) Not wanting to possibly step on Sponge Bob, now that Bikini Bottom has been confirmed as existing off the beach at Seaside
5) News that Ray Nagin is now in charge of devising new evacuation plan for South Walton County
6) Finding out that Jim Cantore is your next door neighbor, in charge of the new show on The Weather Channel titled : Grayton Beach - How People are Preparing for 40 Years of Hurricane Hell at Ground Zero
7) News that a previously undiscovered official map has confirmed that the Bay County line extends to the intersection of 30A and Hwy 98 West
8) News that former County Commissioner Tim Pauls in now in charge of all county beach accesses
9) Fear of inadvertently purchasing next door to Sheryl and Lance, and being kept up all night as he does his drugs while she plays her incessant rock and roll
10)New press release stating Kurt, Smiling Joe and River Otter are moving to North Dakota to brainstorm a new bestseller tentatively titled ? The 12 Steps Required to Deal With the Embarrassment of Owning Property in South Walton County, Florida, Where Property Values for Many Have Tripled in the Last 4 Years, But Now May or May Not Decline in The Short or Long Term, No One Really Knows What is Going to Happen For Sure
:nono1: These are the facts, people!