Apples and Wine

:lolabove: My feet are so sore!!!!

:lolabove: My feet are so sore!!!!

:floor: :floor: :floor:

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the
tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are
afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the
apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the
top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're
amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one
who is brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

Now the Men....
Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to
stomp the sh*t out of them until they turn into something acceptable to
have dinner with. 😀

I love it!:clap_1: :clap_1: :clap_1:

:nono1:

My friend sent me this joke last night which kinda shows that some "grapes" need more stomping than others! :cool:

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed,
>observing his wife turning back
>and forth, looking at herself in the mirror.
>Since her birthday was not far off, he asked
>what she'd like to have for
>her Birthday.

I'd like to be six again, she replied.

>On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early,
>made her a nice big bowl of
>Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags
>theme park. What a day ! He
>put her on every ride in the park; the Death
>Slide, the Wall of Fear, the
>Screaming Monster Roller Coaster... everything
>there was. Five hours later they staggered out of the
>theme park.

Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside
down.

>He then took her to a McDonald's where he
>ordered her a Happy Meal with
>extra fries and a chocolate shake.
>Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop,
>and her favorite candy,
>M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!

>Finally she wobbled home with her
>husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
>He leaned over his wife with a big smile and
>lovingly asked, Well Dear, what
>was it like being six again ??
>Her eyes slowly opened and her _expression
>suddenly changed.

I meant my Dress Size, you dumb a$$ !!

:lolabove:

:lolabove: My feet are so sore!!!!

:rolling: :funn: :floor: :lolabove:

Be careful about stomping those grapes too hard, thereby causing the seeds to burst and making some bad juice which turns into crap-for-wine. 😀 I think that is how Thunderbird is made.

Be careful about stomping those grapes too hard, thereby causing the seeds to burst and making some bad juice which turns into crap-for-wine. 😀 I think that is how Thunderbird is made.

I got me some Mad Dog 20/20.

tangent alert : let me preface this by saying that i can hold my liquor, esp. mixed drinks - it takes a lot to make me drunk. so we went out to eat at this italian place in indy last night, and i got a sour apple martini. it knocked me flat on my a$$ - one drink for crying out loud. i think the waitress slipped me a mickey or something, cause i buzzed all night long after one drink. i was stunned. slept all the way home, and went to bed when we got home and slept until my usual 3 am.

tangent alert : let me preface this by saying that i can hold my liquor, esp. mixed drinks - it takes a lot to make me drunk. so we went out to eat at this italian place in indy last night, and i got a sour apple martini. it knocked me flat on my a$$ - one drink for crying out loud. i think the waitress slipped me a mickey or something, cause i buzzed all night long after one drink. i was stunned. slept all the way home, and went to bed when we got home and slept until my usual 3 am.

Congratulations Audie! Sounds perfect-one drink and you're out!:clap_1: :clap_1: :clap_1:

Be careful about stomping those grapes too hard, thereby causing the seeds to burst and making some bad juice which turns into crap-for-wine. 😀 I think that is how Thunderbird is made.

Is that how Tickle Pink is made?

tangent alert : let me preface this by saying that i can hold my liquor, esp. mixed drinks - it takes a lot to make me drunk. so we went out to eat at this italian place in indy last night, and i got a sour apple martini. it knocked me flat on my a$$ - one drink for crying out loud. i think the waitress slipped me a mickey or something, cause i buzzed all night long after one drink. i was stunned. slept all the way home, and went to bed when we got home and slept until my usual 3 am.

Are you sharing the name of this restaurant? That's probably useful info, knowing where in town you can find kamikaze martinis. ;-)

Are you sharing the name of this restaurant? That's probably useful info, knowing where in town you can find kamikaze martinis. ;-)

it was magianno's at keystone at the crossing, right in front of the mall. they have awesome food ! yum yum !

it was magianno's at keystone at the crossing, right in front of the mall. they have awesome food ! yum yum !

:wub: maggiano's.