Walton Funn August 4, 2006
Area residents are breathing a sigh of relief after Walton County Sheriff?s Department announced the arrest today of the so called ?Walton Swiper?.
In a story mirroring a series of Interstate sniper attacks along Indiana?s highways this summer, south Walton roads have been the scene of terrifying ?swiper? attacks; in which the ?swiper? uses a white paint pen to modify ?W The President? bumper stickers on area cars.
Modifications to the bumper stickers cause them to closely resemble those of the organization -Free the Girls; a Forest Park, Georgia based lesbian group which according to its spokesperson Hilary Parker, ?promotes emancipation of women?s breasts from male imposed bondage. Basically, we don?t like bras.?
The attacks have hit particularly hard in this area, known as the Republican Riviera. Local republican chair Bob Thompson stated ?What with the President?s approval rating down in the 30 percent range, we have already had to tell all the local candidates not to use the word ?Republican? in their TV ads, just stick to ?conservative? we said. And now this, I mean it?s embarrassing enough to be associated with a failed foreign policy and now what?s left of our supporters are driving cars that are promoting some lesbian anti-bra mafia.?
Local Cindi Callahan summed up the anxieties felt by area residents for the past few months, ?You were scared to leave the SUV parked anywhere for too long. I mean Jeez, I haven?t had a restaurant cooked meal since March!?
The perpetrator has been identified as local gadfly, 30-gAy.
Walton County Sherrif?s Department was quick to clarify that the organization Free the Girls is not in any way involved in the attacks.
Parker remarked, ?Really I?m not sure what all the fuss is about, after all, Dick Cheney?s daughter Mary has both stickers on her car.?
Replies
20Beach Fanatic
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 30 gAy!!!!!!!
Killin me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:rofl:
Killin me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:rofl:
Walton Funn August 4, 2006
Area residents are breathing a sigh of relief after Walton County Sheriff?s Department announced the arrest today of the so called ?Walton Swiper?.
In a story mirroring a series of Interstate sniper attacks along Indiana?s highways this summer, south Walton roads have been the scene of terrifying ?swiper? attacks; in which the ?swiper? uses a white paint pen to modify ?W The President? bumper stickers on area cars.
Modifications to the bumper stickers cause them to closely resemble those of the organization -Free the Girls; a Forest Park, Georgia based lesbian group which according to its spokesperson Hilary Parker, ?promotes emancipation of women?s breasts from male imposed bondage. Basically, we don?t like bras.?
The attacks have hit particularly hard in this area, known as the Republican Riviera. Local republican chair Bob Thompson stated ?What with the President?s approval rating down in the 30 percent range, we have already had to tell all the local candidates not to use the word ?Republican? in their TV ads, just stick to ?conservative? we said. And now this, I mean it?s embarrassing enough to be associated with a failed foreign policy and now what?s left of our supporters are driving cars that are promoting some lesbian anti-bra mafia.?
Local Cindi Callahan summed up the anxieties felt by area residents for the past few months, ?You were scared to leave the SUV parked anywhere for too long. I mean Jeez, I haven?t had a restaurant cooked meal since March!?
The perpetrator has been identified as local gadfly, 30-gAy.
Walton County Sherrif?s Department was quick to clarify that the organization Free the Girls is not in any way involved in the attacks.
Parker remarked, ?Really I?m not sure what all the fuss is about, after all, Dick Cheney?s daughter Mary has both stickers on her car.?
Funnkalicious
:funn: Amazing.
Remember the Seaside flasher? I never got to see him. :roll: But he was there!
Remember the Seaside flasher? I never got to see him. :roll: But he was there!
SoWal Expert
FunnChef - AlisonCooks.com
you have way too much time on your hands:clap_1:FunnChef - AlisonCooks.com
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 30 gAy!!!!!!!Biffster...is that a young ND in your tar?:rofl:
Killin me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:rofl:
SoWal Insider
that is great 30gay!!!I
to free the girls.....FunnChef - AlisonCooks.com
My girls have been free all summer.....
I
although they are more like toddlers :funn:
Beach Fanatic
I've heard a new lesbian group will be targeting George next. The group, called "Smooth Sallys", will mount an nationwide effort to get George's last name changed. The group is non-Forest Park, GA based.
Beach Fanatic
You guys are tooo funny!!! :funn:
Beach Fanatic
Yes, and he's damn glad to mechya~!!!!!!!!!!!:funn: :funn: :funn:
Biffster...is that a young ND in your tar?:rofl:
margarita brocolia
ditto that! You're a hoot!
Funnkalicious
Meow
The Girls have gone Wild!!! That was great!!!! :clap_1:
SoWal Expert
Hooray for 30 gAy!!!
beats on hood
That's hilarious, 30-gAy! You remind me why some of my best friends have been gay guys.
Love the signature, too.
You remind me why some of my best friends have been gay guys.Love the signature, too.
brain
:funn: Amazing.
Remember the Seaside flasher? I never got to see him. :roll: But he was there!
Don't remind me of my bad days.
SoWal Guide
one question 30Gay -- what is a gadfly? I've always wanted to know...
directionally challenged
I
I love you guys! :rofl: :rofl:
SoWal Insider
one question 30Gay -- what is a gadfly? I've always wanted to know...
Gadfly" is a term for people who upset the status quo by posing upsetting or novel questions, or attempt to stimulate innovation by proving an irritant. ...
brain
Gadfly" is a term for people who upset the status quo by posing upsetting or novel questions, or attempt to stimulate innovation by proving an irritant. ...
Yes. Socrates calls himself, and Plato then recants his description, as a Gadfly in The Trial and Death of Socrates. It is also a horesfly.
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