Invited to a 40th Anniversary Party, but

:scratch: 40 yrs is quite impressive these days; i would say support by being there, and a small to medium nice gift...

only our "presence" is requested. What do you think is appropriate in this instance. They are very good friends of ours and have been for several decades. Do you think a small gift is appropriate under the circumstances of the invitation?

A donation made in their name to their favorite charity might be nice.

Or if you live in a small town, make a cash donation to their public library for the purchase of more books. So many libraries struggle, either for materials or to keep their programs afloat. The performing arts struggle too. We are contacted by the Chicago Symphony Orchestra every couple of years for donations. Sad.

My in-laws had their 50th a few years ago. They asked for no gifts. But they still received all kinds of china, silver frames, embroidered throws, with their wedding date. The one thing they received that they enjoyed the most, were tickets to plays.

Usually when people go out of their way to say "only your presence is required" it means "no gifts". Since they're good friends I would also treat them to a night out w/ you - dinner and/or theatre etc. to commemorate the occassion.

Great idea sb44!

If they have requested no gifts, please respect their request. A card and a note expressing your affection for them might be something they would enjoy. My parents had this happen for their 50th and in spite of the fact that they had asked for no gifts--they received many things that they simply had no use for and no space for. It became a real chore for my elderly parents to figure out what to do with all the stuff--they did not want to hurt people's feelings, but they really did not want all that stuff. I would say something they can use like tickets to a play or a gift certificate to a favorite restaurant...maybe, but not stuff that needs to be placed somewhere, dusted, etc.

You could bring a nice bottle of wine to the party.

My grandparents issued a moratorium years ago on any gift they couldn't "consume" because they wanted to downsize and avoid clutter.

Now they only accept gifts of homecooked or exotic foods, fruit, chocolate truffles, and firewood!

Usually when people go out of their way to say "only your presence is required" it means "no gifts". Since they're good friends I would also treat them to a night out w/ you - dinner and/or theatre etc. to commemorate the occassion.

Heck yea and they avoid having to write a hundred thank you cards....forget the gifts!!

Better yet, stay and clean up the place after the party.

I agree, respect their request for no gifts. Have funn at the party.

I agree, respect their request for no gifts. Have funn at the party.

This reminds me of the great saying..."what part of NO GIFTS do you not understand?"

my friend and her family are having a 65th anniversary party for their parents; they too have asked for no gifts...they live in a small condo. Their children are giving them a gift certificate for groceries to be delivered for a year....and I recommended some of our Sowal places to get the certificate!

Thank you all. Great advice and lots of good points and suggestions to consider. Miss Kitty, as usual, your no nonsense concision is right on the mark Buuuuutttt, I do like the idea of the play tix or dinner out I'll talk this over with my husband. Thanks all!

This reminds me of the great saying..."what part of NO GIFTS do you not understand?"