He climbs into bed next to her and tries to be reassuring. "My darring, he whispers, "I know dis your firss time and you berry frighten. I pomise you, I give you anyting you want, I do anyting - juss anyting you want. You juss ask... so... whatchu want?" he says, trying to sound experienced and worldly, which he hopes will impress her.
A thoughtful silence follows and he waits patiently (and eagerly) for her request.
She eventually, shyly whispers back, "I want to try something I have heard about from other girls... Numbaa sixxynine."
More thoughtful silence, this time from him.
Eventually, in a puzzled tone, he asks her... "You want... Garlic Chicken wiff steam vegtable?"
________________________________________________________
The Blonde Loses Weight.
This blonde was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet.
"I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat
this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you'll have lost
at least 5 pounds."
When the blonde returned, the doctor was shocked because she had
lost nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "But
did you follow my instructions?" The blonde nodded affirmatively.
"I'll tell you though; I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day."
"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.
"No...From skipping all day!" she replied.
Good ones.
