Thursday Funny

> Subject: A Blonde's Year in Review
>
> January
> Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
>
> February
> Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....
> Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer !!!
>
> March
> Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....
> box said "2-4 years!"
>
> April
> Trapped on escalator for hours .... power went out!!!
>
> May
> Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of
> water won't fit into those little packets!!!
>
> June
> Tried to go water skiing.......couldn't find a lake with a slope.
>
> July
> Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later,
> the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
>
> August
> Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....
> car swamped because soft-top was open.
>
> September
> The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???
>
> October
> Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.
>
> November
>
> Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days .. instructions said 1 hour per pound and I
> weigh 108!!
>
> December
> Couldn't call 911 .... "duh".....there's no "eleven"
> Button on the stupid phone!!!
>
>
> THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR A man was in his front yard
> mowing grass when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the
> house and went straight to the mailbox.
> She opened it then slammed it shut & stormed back in the house.
>
> A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and
> again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she
> went.
>
> As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again,
> marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than
> ever.
>
> Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
> To which she replied, "There certainly is!"
>
> (Are you ready? This is a beauty...)
>
> My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL!"
>