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Officials Try to Rescue Wayward Wales

30gAy avatar
Beach Fanatic
728 views
Well I initially wrote this story during the summer so the news reference is a bit outdated but???




County Officials Try To Rescue Wayward Wales.

Sacramento, California: Coast Guard and marine biologists are scrambling to save two wayward Humpback Whales who have mistakenly swum 90 miles up the Sacramento River and away from their ocean home.

And in a similar development closer to home:

Santa Rosa Beach, Florida: Walton County officials are scrambling to save the Wales family- Jeb, Jo-Lyn, and their daughter Brittany, who were spotted driving up and down county road 30-A.; clearly disoriented. Their license plates identify them as residents of rural Greene County, Alabama.

?They are clearly lost, and don?t seem to have a clue where they are; and seem to be looking for familiar landmarks that could lead them home.?, said a TDC spokesperson.

Officials are expressing concern that the family will need to be returned to their familiar habitat or risk dehydration and starvation. ?They have passed several Wine and Sushi Bars but don?t seem to recognize them as places to get food and drink,? said TDC spokesperson Bill Sampson, ?and the nearest Cracker Barrel is miles down the road in Destin.?

?Their thick accents and colorful colloquialisms are making it hard for us to communicate with them, and so we have had to turn to other methods.? TDC vehicles have been blaring Lynard Skynard over loud speakers in an attempt to lead the Wales family in the direction of the 331 bridge and north to familiar surroundings.

Rural Southerners used to frequent this area, once known as the Redneck Riviera, before gentrification pushed them out.

?It has been some years since we have had a confirmed sighting of a Southern Redneck here in the south part of the county, and we assumed they had become extinct in this habitat.? Sampson explained.

In the event that the Wales cannot find their way back home; officials for the Indian Mound Museum in Fort Walton Beach have expressed an interest in housing them at their museum as part of a display showing the historical inhabitants of the area.

Replies

14
DD avatar
SoWal Expert
#2
Dammit!! I should not have read this while drinking!!!:floor::floor::floor:
scooterbug44 avatar
SoWal Expert
#3
30-gAy, I missed you so much!!! :wub:
Miss Kitty avatar
Meow
#4
He!! is going to be so much funn!!! :clap::wave:
DD avatar
SoWal Expert
#5
He!! is going to be so much funn!!! :clap::wave:

:clap:
DuneAHH avatar
Beach Fanatic
#6
Dammit!! I should not have read this while drinking!!!:floor::floor::floor:

DD....is it 5:00 where you are?? or are you tippling on the J-O-B??;-)

30-gAy, I missed you so much!!! :wub:

Ditto! :biggrin:
Jdarg avatar
SoWal Expert
#7
:floor:Myabe it was the Wales that prompted Seaside to emphasize their beach access signs and Rosemary to enforce their restrictions.
Beach Runner avatar
beats on hood
#8
Wayward Wales or wayward whales?:idontno:
Cheering472 avatar
SoWal Insider
#9
:floor: Hilarious!!
Lady D avatar
SoWal Insider
#10
This is so funny! I love it. :clap:
NoHall avatar
hmmmm......can't remember
#11
You'll have a redneck down there next weekend...:blink: Treat me gently.
BeachSiO2 avatar
Beach Fanatic
#12
You'll have a redneck down there next weekend...:blink: Treat me gently.

Just don't go to Rosemary Beach ;-)

[ame="http://www.sowal.com/bb/showthread.php?t=16668"]Rosemary Thymes Beach Access Article - SoWal Beaches Forum[/ame]

Edited

BeachSiO2 avatar
Beach Fanatic
#14
Topless with a PBR and a boom box? I can drive my jacked up truck on the beach there, can't I?

:scratch:Probably depends on how good you look topless to the men coming back from a long day of golf...

Then again, it would most likely only be the mothers at the beach so you would be better off with a moo moo so that they don't attack you if you DO look good. Jealousy is a dangerous thing especially if their is a trophy wife in the area. Its like blood in the water at feeding time...:nono1:

On another note, they do sell 12 packs of PBR (cans or bottles) down the street at the WD for 6 about bucks.
NoHall avatar
hmmmm......can't remember
#15
:scratch:Probably depends on how good you look topless to the men coming back from a long day of golf...
That depends on how much PBR they had on the golf course!:shock:

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