**How to Shower Like a Woman:
-Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.
-Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
-If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
-Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
-Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
-Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43
added Vitamins.
-Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
-Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
with real passionfruit.
-Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10
minutes until red.
-Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body
wash.
-Rinse conditioner off hair.
-Shave armpits and legs.
-Turn off shower.
-Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
-Spray mould spots with Tilex.
-Get out of shower and stand on bathmat.
-Dry with towel the size of a small country.
-Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
-Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on
head.
-If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
**How To Shower Like a Man:
-Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
leave them in a pile.
-Walk naked to the bathroom.
-If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the
'woo-hoo' sound.
-Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
-Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your a$$.
-Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
-Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them
off.
-Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
-Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
-Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
-Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.
-Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat.
-Dry off forearms and butt only.
-Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out
of the tub the whole time.
-Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water
fly off.
-Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan
on.
-Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
-If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and
make the 'woo-hoo' sound again.
-Throw wet towel on bed.
Replies
3
Beach Fanatic
You forgot the part where they say..."Will you shave my back?"
Beach FanaticAuthor
You forgot the part where they say..."Will you shave my back?"and neck
SoWal Expert
I love this! It's sooooo true!!
Checking your forum account
Please wait while we verify your forum account.