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Ladies...beware!

Miss Kitty avatar
Meow
664 views
IMPORTANT MESSAGE:
You've heard about people who have been abducted and had
their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.
My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years
ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just
that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal.
Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine?
I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs.
Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans.
And then the thieves struck again.
My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they
took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with
earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my
original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.
Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One
morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper
arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really
getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time.
What could they do to me next?
When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with
a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world, wake up and
smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body
parts -stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something
'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere
every night. :biggrin:

P. S. Last year I thought someone had stolen my Boobs. I was
lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was
relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept.
Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.

WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

Edited

Replies

17
NOLA TRANSPLANT avatar
Beach Lover
#2
YOU,............... are too much!!!!!
sunspotbaby avatar
SoWal Insider
#3
I know those thieves Kitty!
It's my kids!
They took my eyelashes too!:blink:
picky
#4
I'm laughing so much I think I might fall on the floor again. :lol:
kathydwells avatar
Darlene is my middle name, not my nickname
#5
I wish you would have posted this several years ago. It is too late for me now.....thanks alot!!!! ;-):wave::biggrin:
DD avatar
SoWal Expert
#6
:clap::clap:
Franny avatar
Beach Fanatic
#7
:floor::clap:Run for your lives or boobies!
Smiling JOe avatar
SoWal Expert
#8
:floor: OMG! You must put that in your blog! I tried to give you rep, but....
Gypsea avatar
Beach Fanatic
#9
:rolling:

I :wub: you MK.
steele mama avatar
Beach Fanatic
#10
You are Erma Bombeck reincarnated!! I finally figured it out!:floor:
Jdarg avatar
SoWal Expert
#11
:floor: OMG! You must put that in your blog! I tried to give you rep, but....


WAIT!!!! Miss Kitty has a blog?:idontno:
DD avatar
SoWal Expert
#12
WAIT!!!! Miss Kitty has a blog?:idontno:

:lolabove: My thoughts exactly!
Miss Kitty avatar
MeowAuthor
#13
:floor: OMG! You must put that in your blog! I tried to give you rep, but....

:floor:
You are Erma Bombeck reincarnated!! I finally figured it out!:floor:

I didn't write it...except for the :biggrin:.

WAIT!!!! Miss Kitty has a blog?:idontno:

:lolabove: My thoughts exactly!

:funn:...Miss Kitty has no blog, but she is a blob. My thighs still hurt from lunging the other day and now I have to go back this morning. :eek:
Mango avatar
SoWal Insider
#14
:lolabove: Someone stole my haircolor too.
seagrovegirl avatar
Beach Fanatic
#15
Someone ADDED a chin while I was sleeping. Looks like a biscuit.
Matt J avatar
SWGB
#16
It happens to guys too, I am home to the US strategic lard reserve. :biggrin:
sunspotbaby avatar
SoWal Insider
#17
It happens to guys too, I am home to the US strategic lard reserve. :biggrin:

Gimme a large break!
Matt J avatar
SWGB
#18
Gimme a large break!

Seriously, I need to lose weight. Me and another sowaller have committed to biking and kayaking our respective butts off.

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