just my $.02
BR, I agree with Mermaid regarding your home. The things you describe regarding your house as things you cannot live without, are obviously not making you happy. Think about that. I have learned that I don't have to own everything that I like, and often find other people may treasure something as much, or more than I. When you sell your house, pass along a note of all the little things which have gone into your home. Believe me, the new owners will gladly treasure them too. Look at it as a new opportunity to find new treasures, if that is what floats your boat. If you downsized and simplified, your hubby could hang up the work coat and spend more time with you.
just my $.02
just my $.02
Replies
26
beats on hood
BR, I agree with Mermaid regarding your home. The things you describe regarding your house as things you cannot live without, are obviously not making you happy. Think about that. I have learned that I don't have to own everything that I like, and often find other people may treasure something as much, or more than I. When you sell your house, pass along a note of all the little things which have gone into your home. Believe me, the new owners will gladly treasure them too. Look at it as a new opportunity to find new treasures, if that is what floats your boat. If you downsized and simplified, your hubby could hang up the work coat and spend more time with you.This house has too much of who we are (our shared love of our love of NOLA which is where we met and fell in love) to sell. It's really a special house.
just my $.02
He loves his job. He loves the challenges and how much cutting-edge technology he is involved in. He never wants to retire.
You're probably right, though. Thanks for caring.
Edited
SoWal ExpertAuthor
Although I don't watch much Dr. Phil, I once heard him tell a guy, "You can be right, or you can be happy." On another show, he asked a guest, who was telling the way in which she had been doing something, "how's that working for you? I am a results-oriented therapist."
Those two Dr. Phil statements can apply to all aspects of life. I have used them often.
Those two Dr. Phil statements can apply to all aspects of life. I have used them often.
Beach Fanatic
Although I don't watch much Dr. Phil, I once heard him tell a guy, "You can be right, or you can be happy." On another show, he asked a guest, who was telling the way in which she had been doing something, "how's that working for you? I am a results-oriented therapist."I'm not much inclined down the pop psych path, but "How's that working for you?" is a profound question if you take it seriously. We learn pretty quickly not to touch hot things 'cause it hurts. For some reason, similar introspection involving other than the physical seems not as natural for many folks...
Those two Dr. Phil statements can apply to all aspects of life. I have used them often.
Meow
Okay BR....here's what you do. Pull out everything you hold dear and sentimental in your house and replace with nice quality replacements. Then get the heck out of there honey. Life is too short to worry about things. No one gets a prize in Heaven for what they have accumulted on Earth. You don't have to give up "things" that bring you pleasure to simplify, but just make sure you are not a prisoner of material things. Get back down here and look at the sunset...
kt loo
When my house burnt a few years back and I lost everything, it was strangely freeing. For me, less stuff=less stress. I like freedom.
However, sounds like the satisfaction you get from your surroundings is profound for you and your husband. If the positives outweight the negatives in the long run for you, and your home brings you a sense of peace because of the heart and soul you built into it, that's very cool. Whatever gets you through the night...s'allright....
would love to see some pix of the NOLA staircase etc.
However, sounds like the satisfaction you get from your surroundings is profound for you and your husband. If the positives outweight the negatives in the long run for you, and your home brings you a sense of peace because of the heart and soul you built into it, that's very cool. Whatever gets you through the night...s'allright....
would love to see some pix of the NOLA staircase etc.
got any pics?
Life is too short to worry about things. No one gets a prize in Heaven for what they have accumulted on Earth.
I thought is was "He who dies with the most toys wins"
SoWal ExpertAuthor
When my house burnt a few years back and I lost everything, it was strangely freeing. For me, less stuff=less stress. I like freedom.
I once read of a tribe somewhere in Africa, where the tribe sent the boys into the woods for a month or so when they turned 14 (I think). While away, the boys' hut, with everything in it, would be burned to the ground. The boys come back as men.
Beach Fanatic
I once read of a tribe somewhere in Africa, where the tribe sent the boys into the woods for a month or so when they turned 14 (I think). While away, the boys' hut, with everything in it, would be burned to the ground. The boys come back as men.
And they're pissed! "My X-Box is melted!!!"
Beach Fanatic
I thought is was "He who dies with the most toys wins"RO is waxing philosophicallly again!
picky
This house has too much of who we are (our shared love of our love of NOLA which is where we met and fell in love) to sell. It's really a special house.
He loves his job. He loves the challenges and how much cutting-edge technology he is involved in. He never wants to retire.
You're probably right, though. Thanks for caring.
Given the sentimental mindset you have attached to your house, BR, thank goodness you are living in an imitation NO, not the real thing! It would have been doubly difficult for you to have lost your house had you been living in NO. (Though I have no doubt you'd have made short work of any looters foolhardy enough to have approached!
Bam! )beats on hood
Given the sentimental mindset you have attached to your house, BR, thank goodness you are living in an imitation NO, not the real thing! It would have been doubly difficult for you to have lost your house had you been living in NO. (Though I have no doubt you'd have made short work of any looters foolhardy enough to have approached!Yeah, what has happened in NOLA just breaks my heart. If they rebuild without preserving the architectural styles, it will be an immense tragedy, in my opinion.
I've been teased about being Ma Kettle. Once a friend arrived unexpectedly at night. I went out on the top gallery with a shotgun and said, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it." My friend said, "It's me, Patsy. Don't shoot!" My husband was out of town. I was a bit scared. It was not long after the home invasion.
Meow
This thread needs to be titled...Beach Runner's GUN! Girl, you are scaring the doo doo out of me! Put down the gun and find a real estate agent.
got any pics?
RO is waxing philosophicallly again!
That's what I do
beats on hood
This thread needs to be titled...Beach Runner's GUN! Girl, you are scaring the doo doo out of me! Put down the gun and find a real estate agent.Honey, you'd have a gun, too, if you had ever been upstairs with your eight-year-old daughter in a deep sleep, your husband was in Japan, you were jolted awake with burglars downstairs, had no way to contact the outside world because the phone lines were cut by the burglars, and had the choice of jumping off the upper gallery (Louisiana for upstairs porch) or running down the stairs and hoping they didn't rape and/or kill you as you ran by, and BTW it took the cops 20 minutes to get to you when the house is two miles from the main police station.
So now I'm prepared. I always have a gun and a cell phone nearby.
SoWal ExpertAuthor
All you need is two guard dogs like mine. You can then rest easy at night, without shotguns and fear.
beats on hood
All you need is two guard dogs like mine. You can then rest easy at night, without shotguns and fear.Yeah, we tried that. We bought a Weimaraner. Most people were scared of her, so she'd get aggressive. But the burglar type (not scared) would scare her and she'd hide in the garage. Poor baby! Had to put her down in January at Auburn Univ. Vet School due to bacterial endocarditis. :'(
The poodle is a good guard dog. Her bark has a more bass sound than the Weim's, so it scares people. But she stays indoors to be company for me and because we signed a contract from the breeder imposing a fine and possible confiscation if we keep her outdoors.
SoWal Staff
Okay BR....here's what you do. Pull out everything you hold dear and sentimental in your house and replace with nice quality replacements. Then get the heck out of there honey. Life is too short to worry about things. No one gets a prize in Heaven for what they have accumulted on Earth. You don't have to give up "things" that bring you pleasure to simplify, but just make sure you are not a prisoner of material things. Get back down here and look at the sunset...
Amen.
And, once you get rid of it you'll never remember you even had it. Think only in the present and near future!
SoWal ExpertAuthor
Yeah, we tried that. We bought a Weimaraner. Most people were scared of her, so she'd get aggressive. But the burglar type (not scared) would scare her and she'd hide in the garage. Poor baby! Had to put her down in January at Auburn Univ. Vet School due to bacterial endocarditis. :'(
The poodle is a good guard dog. Her bark has a more bass sound than the Weim's, so it scares people. But she stays indoors to be company for me and because we signed a contract from the breeder imposing a fine and possible confiscation if we keep her outdoors.
Who said anything about outdoor dogs? Both of my boys stay inside. A burglar would be crazy to break into my house.
SoWal Expert
Friends of my parents had a great idea- they put one of the giant paper doll cutouts of people in their foyer- theirs was Michael Jordan. If you tried to peer through the stained or textured glass around the front door, all you saw was this HUGE guy standing there!
beats on hood
Who said anything about outdoor dogs? Both of my boys stay inside. A burglar would be crazy to break into my house.Cool. My sister keeps her big dogs inside, too. Think burglars would be scared of a giant poodle?
Meow
Cool. My sister keeps her big dogs inside, too. Think burglars would be scared of a giant poodle?
"All dogs should be kept inside"...sez Molly!
bean
Cool. My sister keeps her big dogs inside, too. Think burglars would be scared of a giant poodle?
Are big poodles ferocious? If they're anything like our toy poodle...probably not. Ours doesn't even bark. She would probably sleep through any intruder and if she did wake up she would want them to pet her and rub her tummy.
Funnkalicious
Friends of my parents had a great idea- they put one of the giant paper doll cutouts of people in their foyer- theirs was Michael Jordan. If you tried to peer through the stained or textured glass around the front door, all you saw was this HUGE guy standing there!Ohh I have a Darth Vadar and Ricky Martin cut out from when I was in high school (and Ricky from College) if needed! :funn:
SoWal Expert
Ohh I have a Darth Vadar and Ricky Martin cut out from when I was in high school (and Ricky from College) if needed! :funn:
Kimmi- I'm not worried about you-just stab a bad guy with those 5" heels!
(Or make someone wear them!)
Meow
Kimmi- I'm not worried about you-just stab a bad guy with those 5" heels!
(Or make someone wear them!)
That's what they are for! Thanks jdarg for clearing up the mystery of the 5 inch heels!!!
I especially like your second suggestion....sort of like what HMM figures if anyone were to kidnap me...."Please take her back, we will PAY you!"
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