Age...

For what it's worth...contentment comes from within. And that's the good news. The choices we make throughout our lives can be either wise or careless...even wreckless. The trick, I think, is to learn as early as possible to make positive choices. Life goes by quickly. It's a shame to get stuck in a loop at some point in the journey...repeating the same mistake time and again. I remember a lawyer friend telling me that he had a client who married the same women time and time again (they were different women in reality) but nonetheless, looked the same...acted the same. A pretty unhappy client, time and time again. There's is always something new around the corner to explore...to learn. Try to center yourself, grasp the whole picture and, most of all, enjoy the trip! Lucky for us, it comes from within...the ability to enjoy life...from knowing ourselves and from making wise choices, learning from our mistakes, given our abilities, characteristics, loves and likes. Just my two cents' worth. Waxing philosophic tonight...

...I remember a lawyer friend telling me that he had a client who married the same women time and time again (they were different women in reality) but nonetheless, looked the same...acted the same. A pretty unhappy client, time and time again. ...

...and more importantly, he divorced the same woman time and time again.

bsmart...please clarify. You talk about figuring out your plan for life at 23. Good for you! Where does this engagement ring come into all of this? I don't know your whole story, but in some ways I feel you are trying to do everything at once...like you have a timetable imposed by your peer group. You seem to me to be tying hard to think and GET OUT of that BOX. Keep asking the questions and be flexible.

Although I have been 23 since June 1st, sometimes I have to sit and think...wait how old am I again? On an unconscious level something wants to say 25...for some odd reason. Then there is the fact that I still cannot believe that I am actually in my 20s, it seems like yesterday I was only graduating from high school, then moving into a dorm at UGA and saying goodbye to my mom and dad and actually having watery eyes while doing it. Then sometimes I think, "well here I am 23, haven't done anything significant" and there is a rush that comes over me to get things done so that I will be accomplished by the time I am 30.

Slow down and enjoy where you are. It is great to plan, but enjoy the trip to the end. My daughter receieved a full scholarship to a prestigious east coast grad school school and chose to work a while before completing her next degree. I cannot tell you how much she has grown and learned about people and how the world works. There are many life experiences she would have missed if she had gone straight to grad school. There are no wrong choices, just detours. Unless you have had your lawyer dream for many years and are completely certain that is what you want, wait. Since you asked this question, there are doubts. In my experience most people do not know what they want and try to fulfill a parent's dream, not theirs.

My daughter as well graduated and worked before now applying to grad school. It's amazing how much she grew and was able to focus on just what she really wanted to do!

bsmart...love your lady, but think before you leap at this young age. An engagement and/or a marriage now could really limit you.

My daughter as well graduated and worked before now applying to grad school. It's amazing how much she grew and was able to focus on just what she really wanted to do!

bsmart...love your lady, but think before you leap at this young age. An engagement and/or a marriage now could really limit you.

I have to agree wth you. I've met way too many divorced 28 year olds. It's really shocking. I have a lot of friends that got married before 25 and it's like . I wouldn't rush it...but that's just me.

I don't keep this stuff in my calendar, but I will gladly revisit the topic if you bring it up.

Deal!

Deal!

Peapod, will you be living large in the next 30 days? I hope so.

Peapod, will you be living large in the next 30 days? I hope so.

NO. This 'tar is scaring me Smiley J.

NO. This 'tar is scaring me Smiley J.

Me Too.....it reminds me of something from Jurassic Park!!! I am sure it is the eye of one of his fur babies though...but I feel like I am being watched!

Thank you gulls! You have heard of my aversion to frogs and toads. Frogs can be cute and pretty to look at...TOADS are the Devil's pets! Ugly and skeery looking, and I do not like looking at them!!!! BLEEECH!

Peapod, will you be living large in the next 30 days? I hope so.

I hope so, too! This time next month I'll be in SoWal!

I hope so, too! This time next month I'll be in SoWal!

HOORAY! Another sowaler on her way!!!! I am not even jealous! Just happy happy for you!

I hope so, too! This time next month I'll be in SoWal!

I am jealous! But happy for you!

I am jealous! But happy for you!

Hey, Martini! Thanks--come on down, I'm looking for birthday party attendees!

I am jealous! But happy for you!

DITTO.

Interesting thread!!
My son is a great example of someone following their OWN DREAMS and not those of others!! Mid-30's, as long as he has his laptop with him he can manage his business from anywhere!! He LOVES HIS LIFE!!! As his mom, that is one of the most wonderful things I know about him & is just a great source of happiness for his parents!! He is so CONTENT!! He is very smart and has never followed the herd. (In high school this did cause us extreme STRESS!!)

Seriously, he understands much of what other wise souls have added to this thread, and he never wanted to be chasing STUFF!! He is the best example of Plan Your Work & Work Your Plan that I have ever seen!! He has been able to create a life of total freedom by following his dreams, passions, interests & is not encumbered with anything that is not important to him or our family. This spring he embarked on a personal journey of totally getting out of his current GOOD comfort zone and traveling to Sri Lanka to assist with relief efforts after reading a USA Today article. As if his life could get any better, it did!!! He ended up staying many extra weeks, and is returning for 3 mos. in January to continue to help those folks by building more houses. A number of his original group of volunteers (the really hard working ones!!) have been planning this return since their work there this spring. Living simple but deliberate lives certainly enables all of them to do this!!

Our lawyer friends(in their 50's) love talking to him and are in awe of what he has accomplished....often telling him they wish they had done something like that! Many of his school friends who have followed the herd, their parents plans, or the trust fund route have already experienced divorce, mega stress,
and never seem to be content! He seems to have captured CONTENTMENT FROM WITHIN (see whitesands previous post) to the MAX!! It evidently works for him. Bsmart, hope that this personal story gives you more food for thought for your journey!!

Mom, you are embarassing me.

Thanks pk...another one for my son to read when he gets home Friday!

I know you just love getting all this advice, but you did ask for it. First, I congratulate you in knowing what general direction you want your life to take. My first question to you is have you been inside a courtroom? I am so shocked by the number of graduating attorneys that have never been in or viewed trials and mundane happenings in a courtroom. It's not LA Law. I don't know anything about environmental law, but is your interest law or is it the environment. I make this point because you might be happier doing something else regarding the environment. You know what they say "Do What You Love and You'll Never Work a Day in your Life." Learn to listen to your first inclination, it is usually the right thing for you.

P.S. You see, I have a son that is a senior in high school, he doesn't have a clue what direction he wants to go.

I know you just love getting all this advice, but you did ask for it. First, I congratulate you in knowing what general direction you want your life to take. My first question to you is have you been inside a courtroom? I am so shocked by the number of graduating attorneys that have never been in or viewed trials and mundane happenings in a courtroom. It's not LA Law. I don't know anything about environmental law, but is your interest law or is it the environment. I make this point because you might be happier doing something else regarding the environment. You know what they say "Do What You Love and You'll Never Work a Day in your Life." Learn to listen to your first inclination, it is usually the right thing for you.

P.S. You see, I have a son that is a senior in high school, he doesn't have a clue what direction he wants to go.

Is there a child out there that really does know what he watns to do???? You are not alone.

Hey, Martini! Thanks--come on down, I'm looking for birthday party attendees!

Don't tempt me! I do have lots of vacation days to burn. If only I had some vacation cash to burn as well.

I find it to be crazy that we send our kids off to school to decide what they want to be in four years. Do we not see from statistics that the average person changes careers 4-7 times in their lifetime. When kids do get to college the only thing they truely learn is how to live a life away from parents. That is one heck of a costly lesson. Imagine if kids already knew how to do this before they attended college -- maybe they could actually learn something. Life experience is a wonderful thing, and no college attendee should be without it. Education is great, but you can get that at the library in today's world. Most job tasks and lessons are learned on the job. In my opinion, schools should be there to inspire the students, and benefit the world through the ideas of the students. Most schools today do not encourage independent thought. They stuff you with info and ask you to regurgitateit. Forget about thinking outside the box. You will receive an F, for failure! What the heck is that about? Failure to blend in and do as Whitey says or else, you are a failure? I just don't get it.

Dbuck, I have some ideas for your kid while he ponders a direction in life. College is not necessary immediately after high school. (ever wonder why the call it high school?) I highly recommend that recent high school graduates take a walk about for a while. There are plenty of long distance trails in the US, which will be perfect. Being alone for such a long period helps one to "be" (verb). The people whom he meets along the way will have more to teach him than he learned in all of his high school years. College may still be a choice for him later, but only when he is eager to learn, otherwise, what is the point?

Another thing that I wish I had known about when I completed high school were exchange programs. Who says you have to go while you are still in high-school? Living with another family in another town or country can be very informative.

One other thing which immediately comes to mind are volunteer programs around the world. Get out and see that which the world has to offer, and try to understand others' points of view.

Just a few thoughts.

Mom, you are embarassing me.

Thank you for getting rid of that whatever 'tar! What the....

One other thing which immediately comes to mind are volunteer programs around the world. Get out and see that which the world has to offer, and try to understand others' points of view.

One of my kid's best friends is doing Teach America in Brooklyn this year.

Another good buddy did Americorps the year before he began college. That kid, who happens to be Jewish, spent a year building churches in the rural Southeast states.

My son, the one a year younger than BSmart, saved money all through his teen years for a 6 week solo trip through Europe the summer after he graduated high school. He is spending this year in France teaching French kindergarten and first grade teachers methods of teaching English. Next year it's grad school, though he has not ruled out the Peace Corps.

I agree that taking some time to get out and about in the world makes for a more thoughtful, well-rounded person; someone with the experience to explore and absorb new ideas and concepts. I loved Art History class, but it was going to the Prado in Madrid or the Uffizi in Florence that really blew my mind.

However, these days employers look upon a college degree the way they used to consider a high school diploma. Education has become a commodity.

It's too bad that so often there are kids who would like but don't get to have a formal education, while there are so many upon whom it is wasted.