Ok....I just gotta weigh in on this southern trend....
Texas Sayings
"Don't Squat With Yer Spurs On, A Cowboy's Guide To Life" by Texas Bix Bender
There's more ways to skin a cat than stickin' his head in a boot jack and jerkin' on his tail.
Never ask a man the size of his spread.
Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.
After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: when you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
If you find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.
It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
When dealin' with a slick son of a b...., start off by pinnin' him down and changin' his oil.
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
Never follow good whiskey with water, unless you're out of good whiskey.
If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.
Good judgement comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be suprised if they learn their lesson.
The best way to have a quiche for dinner is to make it up and put it in the oven to bake at 325 degrees. Meanwhile, get out a large T-bone, grill it, and when it's done, eat it. As for the quiche, continue to let it bake, but otherwise ignore it.
There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.
When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.
Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.
A smart ass just don't fit in a saddle.
Never miss a good chance to shutup.
Replies
25
Beach Fanatic
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.
This seems to apply to a few on this board, but I won't name names. :floor:
This seems to apply to a few on this board, but I won't name names. :floor:
SoWal ExpertAuthor
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.
This seems to apply to a few on this board, but I won't name names. :floor:
;-)
Beach Fanatic
You're one of those cats I was talking about.:clap_1:
SoWal Insider
I guess if a smart a$$ doesn't fit in the saddle, Mango won't riding Daisy anytime soon. :lolabove:
SoWal ExpertAuthor
You're one of those cats I was talking about.:clap_1:
Who me? :floor: Now, I know some board secrets that will go to my grave with me!!
SoWal ExpertAuthor
I guess if a smart a$$ doesn't fit in the saddle, Mango won't riding Daisy anytime soon. :lolabove:
:floor: :rofl:
beats on hood
Ok....I just gotta weigh in on this southern trend....Oh, Jesus, my Mom was born in Canton, Texas. Some of the things she says are hilarious. And I've been around her so much lately because she's been ill that I'm picking up the sayings and THE EAST TEXAS ACCENT! 😱 I've just got to record some of the Texas things she says.
Texas Sayings
SoWal ExpertAuthor
Oh, Jesus, my Mom was born in Canton, Texas. Some of the things she says are hilarious. And I've been around her so much lately because she's been ill that I'm picking up the sayings and THE EAST TEXAS ACCENT! 😱 I've got to record some of her Texas sayings.
Ah luv East Texas! Used to work quite a bit out there and go to Canton every chance I get. I learned real quick that they truly are all related!! Yes, you do need to record those sayings!! They have a million that are hilarious, but of course, I can never remember them!!
SoWal Insider
I think I would be :banned: if I posted a thread on New York sayings! :rolling:
Skunky
"They don't teach Texas history in your school?"-Honest to goodness quote from my Texan sister-in-law on the seemingly woeful state of education in south Louisiana Catholic schools :funn:
Mess with Texas :floor:
Mess with Texas :floor:
SoWal ExpertAuthor
I think I would be :banned: if I posted a thread on New York sayings! :rolling:
I think more than one person has proved that it's pretty hard to get banned on here. ;-)
SoWal ExpertAuthor
"They don't teach Texas history in your school?"-Honest to goodness quote from my Texan sister-in-law on the seemingly woeful state of education in south Louisiana Catholic schools :funn:
Mess with Texas :floor:
:floor:
Skunky
Ah luv East Texas! Used to work quite a bit out there and go to Canton every chance I get. I learned real quick that they truly are all related!! Yes, you do need to record those sayings!! They have a million that are hilarious, but of course, I can never remember them!!
Isn't Don Henley from Canton? Mrs Skunk and I walked to the box office in Shreveport two hours pre-Eagles concert in 2002 and and scored front row seats he had saved for his family but were released. We sat next to his East Tex people, very nice and normal crew. Unreal night :clap_1:
Beach Fanatic
I am envious, I love the Eagles. :clap_1:
SoWal ExpertAuthor
Isn't Don Henley from Canton? Mrs Skunk and I walked to the box office in Shreveport two hours pre-Eagles concert in 2002 and and scored front row seats he had saved for his family but were released. We sat next to his East Tex people, very nice and normal crew. Unreal night :clap_1:
Oh man!! What a wonderful memory! DH was born in Gilmer, Tx. He's one of my faves!! :clap_1:
SoWal Insider
I am envious, I love the Eagles. :clap_1:
me too, taste a little like chicken. :funn:
SoWal ExpertAuthor
me too, taste a little like chicken. :funn:
:floor: Hey now, those are my boys you're talkin' about!!
beats on hood
Isn't Don Henley from Canton? Mrs Skunk and I walked to the box office in Shreveport two hours pre-Eagles concert in 2002 and and scored front row seats he had saved for his family but were released. We sat next to his East Tex people, very nice and normal crew. Unreal night :clap_1:Dunno. I'll have to look it up. BTW my cousin, Bob Neill, from Tyler, Texas, where my Mom's family moved to from Canton, graduated from SMU (theater major) and was the star of the short-lived TV show, "The Man with the Power." Bobby and I were in love as kids and planned to move to a state that allowed first cousins to marry so that, obviously, we could get married. HOW SCARY IS THAT?
SoWal Insider
:floor: Hey now, those are my boys you're talkin' about!!
Sorry, that darn distemper again. :bang: ;-)
SoWal ExpertAuthor
Dunno. I'll have to look it up. BTW my cousin, Bob Neill, from Tyler, Texas, where my Mom's family moved to from Canton, graduated from SMU (theater major) and was the star of the short-lived TV show, "The Man with the Power." Bobby and I were in love as kids and planned to move to a state that allowed first cousins to marry so that, obviously, we could get married. HOW SCARY IS THAT?
😱 Your life would have certainly taken a different direction, I'm sure!!
beats on hood
😱 Your life would have certainly taken a different direction, I'm sure!!Really.:funn:
fartblossom
my papaw always said don't s%$# where you eat, and don't eat the yellow snow - pay attention to the last one miss kitty !
SoWal Guide
:clap_1:
well, as some of my fine co-workers at the fire department used to say: well, even a blind hawg can find an acorn ever now 'n agin...
my papaw always said don't s%$# where you eat, and don't eat the yellow snow - pay attention to the last one miss kitty !:clap_1:
well, as some of my fine co-workers at the fire department used to say: well, even a blind hawg can find an acorn ever now 'n agin...
SoWal Insider
I am envious, I love the Eagles. :clap_1:
Me too dbuck!
Beach Fanatic
:clap_1: :clap_1:Up north we say "Even a blind squirrel can find a acorn."
well, as some of my fine co-workers at the fire department used to say: well, even a blind hawg can find an acorn ever now 'n agin...
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