I made a big mistake last week. I told a sowaller the identity of another sowaller. The two have something in common with each other and I didn't think anything about it. It mattered, and I upset a (hopefully not former) friend. I learned about my lapse of judgment this morning and immediately sent an e-mail of apology. I have 2 profiles; I'm on now as Garner, my real name, that I use for real estate related posts. My other profile is Sunshine; I use that for everything else. I don't really care if people know that Sunshine and Garner are the same and I didn't realize how sacred the "keep the identity secret rule" was.
To the sowaller that I exposed - again, I'm sorry; I won't do it again.
I am posting this so that another sowaller doesn't accidentally make the same mistake.
Replies
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FunnChef - AlisonCooks.com
Mistakes happen, we are all friends here anyway. 
Hope all goes well for you, and don't stop posting!
Hope all goes well for you, and don't stop posting!picky
Don't worry about it Garner. I get in trouble all the time for my big mouth. It happens with the best of intentions. 
Darlene is my middle name, not my nickname
I know some folks are sensitive about there identities...just ask all of the River Otters running around SoWal. You made an honest mistake and apologized for it. Hopefully your friend will see that it was a mistake and forgive you and go on. Life is too short to be upset over some things. IMHO!!!!
Beach Fanatic
I didn't know SoWal was an offshoot of the witness protection program.
fartblossom
I didn't know SoWal was an offshoot of the witness protection program.
little sugar
Garner....no worries! seriously if someone gets upset over that, they must not have much else to worry about in life......carry on my friend ;-)
got any pics?
I'm sure it's ok..... I goof up all the time and GB is still with me
Beach Fanatic
I didn't know SoWal was an offshoot of the witness protection program.
I thought that was the purpose of the soiree recently - to meet everybody and get to know them for real. Glad you let us know.
SoWal Guide
this sounds like a private matter that probably does not need to be discussed here, especially since the person in question didn't like being identified in the first place... just my opinion. (and I respect anyone's desire for privacy, especially on the internet. none of us want our personal information given to those we don't know whether its in a post or on the street).
Edited
beats on hood
My main problem is that there are lurkers on the board who might deduce or be told a person's real identity, know when they're at their primary residence or the beach, or know when they plan to be out for the evening, and rob them.
Another problem is people like message boards because they can disguise their identities, kick back, and just have funn without worrying about maintaining a facade. They might be likely to say something that they wouldn't say if their identity were known. Once the identity is revealed, it feels like an invasion of privacy and could prove to be embarrassing, especially for high-profile individuals or individuals in certain professions. I've always felt that the unwritten rule is that the identity of fellow posters is to be hidden unless they explicitly choose to reveal their identity on the board.
Another problem is people like message boards because they can disguise their identities, kick back, and just have funn without worrying about maintaining a facade. They might be likely to say something that they wouldn't say if their identity were known. Once the identity is revealed, it feels like an invasion of privacy and could prove to be embarrassing, especially for high-profile individuals or individuals in certain professions. I've always felt that the unwritten rule is that the identity of fellow posters is to be hidden unless they explicitly choose to reveal their identity on the board.
Beach Fanatic
Garner....no worries! seriously if someone gets upset over that, they must not have much else to worry about in life......carry on my friend ;-)Ditto :roll:
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SoWal Insider
I made a big mistake last week. I told a sowaller the identity of another sowaller. The two have something in common with each other and I didn't think anything about it. It mattered, and I upset a (hopefully not former) friend. I learned about my lapse of judgment this morning and immediately sent an e-mail of apology. I have 2 profiles; I'm on now as Garner, my real name, that I use for real estate related posts. My other profile is Sunshine; I use that for everything else. I don't really care if people know that Sunshine and Garner are the same and I didn't realize how sacred the "keep the identity secret rule" was.
To the sowaller that I exposed - again, I'm sorry; I won't do it again.
I am posting this so that another sowaller doesn't accidentally make the same mistake.
I am afraid you made another faux pas here.
This is a personal matter between you and the SoWaler.
We have not seen the SoWaler posting a thread stating your lapse in judgement.
Although SoWal is a small community, and most people who post regularly here have gotten to meet or have long standing relationships, there are still close to 4K Members and who knows how many "lurkers", and I don't mean that in a derogatory way, but people who read without posting or logging in. The internet has opened the door to many wonderful things like meeting SoWalers, but at the same time gives opportunity to unsavory types as well.
Further, people sometimes form opinions of others based on posts, and we have also all seen some people come on here, make trouble, get banned etc.
Perhaps my being a life long New York resident has made me more tainted than most in regards to issues this like, but I am sure there are two sides to every story.
Perhaps that Sowaler feels slightly violated by not asking first whether he or she's name be divulged, especially if the true identity of he/she was easily obtained if you say they had something in common.
We don't even know if either person was a regular Sowaler or not? Did you even meet the Sowaler personally?
Garner, you seem like a very nice person and obviously it bothered you enough to post a thread regarding it, but the people who want their identities known would most likely have signed in as their true names and if you came in the lounge more often would see footsy pictures mostly.
You even have two screen names.
I don't think you lost a friend, I am sure he or she will come around. Like KDW said, life is too short to carry a grudge or something like that. ;-)
Edited
Admin
I made a big mistake last week. I told a sowaller the identity of another sowaller. The two have something in common with each other and I didn't think anything about it. It mattered, and I upset a (hopefully not former) friend. I learned about my lapse of judgment this morning and immediately sent an e-mail of apology. I have 2 profiles; I'm on now as Garner, my real name, that I use for real estate related posts. My other profile is Sunshine; I use that for everything else. I don't really care if people know that Sunshine and Garner are the same and I didn't realize how sacred the "keep the identity secret rule" was.
To the sowaller that I exposed - again, I'm sorry; I won't do it again.
I am posting this so that another sowaller doesn't accidentally make the same mistake.
Give them a Snickers bar.
SoWal Guide
Garner....no worries! seriously if someone gets upset over that, they must not have much else to worry about in life......carry on my friend ;-)
Believe me, you don't want your personal information given out to someone you don't know. This isn't a matter of revealing your sowal identity - some of us care about this and some of us don't. It is a matter of privacy in a business matter. Knowing the situation from my friend, I know Garner didn't intentionally do harm, but it still wasn't appropriate. This public apology only made an uncomfortable situation worse for my dear sowal friend.
Edited
SoWal Insider
I didn't know SoWal was an offshoot of the witness protection program.
I'm sure it's ok..... I goof up all the time and GB is still with meand you are short, fat and bald ;-)
Give them a Snickers bar.:rofl:
SoWal Guide
My main problem is that there are lurkers on the board who might deduce or be told a person's real identity, know when they're at their primary residence or the beach, or know when they plan to be out for the evening, and rob them.
Another problem is people like message boards because they can disguise their identities, kick back, and just have funn without worrying about maintaining a facade. They might be likely to say something that they wouldn't say if their identity were known. Once the identity is revealed, it feels like an invasion of privacy and could prove to be embarrassing, especially for high-profile individuals or individuals in certain professions. I've always felt that the unwritten rule is that the identity of fellow posters is to be hidden unless they explicitly choose to reveal their identity on the board.
you raise good points BR. the main thing I see here is, we don't commonly give out our friends contact info unless we know its okay with them, and this would include internet info (email, board name, etc). And if you do give it out, then you know that person well enough to know they won't mind. if you don't know someone very well, then it's best to ask them first, or just don't give out their info at all. there is rarely good reason to do so. It's just common sense, courtesy, and respect.
my problem with Garner's post (above) is that it only tells part of a complicated story. there is no need in telling it at all.
Edited
got any pics?
and you are short, fat and bald ;-)
:rofl:
I'm working on it
.... cut out the sugars and exercising like crazy.got any pics?
Give them a Snickers bar.
I was thinking a Brusters Icecream Cake.
SoWal Insider
I was thinking a Brusters Icecream Cake.
RO, no cake, in the South its PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII. :funn:
Edited
Beach Fanatic
you raise good points BR. the main thing I see here is, we don't commonly give out our friends contact info unless we know its okay with them, and this would include internet info (email, board name, etc). And if you do give it out, then you know that person well enough to know they won't mind. if you don't know someone very well, then it's best to ask them first, or just don't give out their info at all. there is rarely good reason to do so. It's just common sense, courtesy, and respect.
my problem with Garner's post (above) is that it only tells part of a complicated story. there is no need in telling it at all.
SoWal Guide
RO, no cake, in the South its PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII. :funn:
well, somtimes we do break down and eat CAKE. one syllable.
SoWal Guide
as I said, there is no need in talking about any of this here at all. so go eat your popcorn on another thread my dear unplugged, who I have missed!!!
Beach Fanatic
you raise good points BR. the main thing I see here is, we don't commonly give out our friends contact info unless we know its okay with them, and this would include internet info (email, board name, etc). And if you do give it out, then you know that person well enough to know they won't mind. if you don't know someone very well, then it's best to ask them first, or just don't give out their info at all. there is rarely good reason to do so. It's just common sense, courtesy, and respect.okay, okay, so I had to try
my problem with Garner's post (above) is that it only tells part of a complicated story. there is no need in telling it at all.
Have missed you guys too
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SoWal Guide
okay, okay, so I had to try
Have missed you guys too
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well, we were partying at the beach tonight, but we didnt' know you were around... so glad you are in town.
are you all having funn???
Beach Fanatic
We had lots of funn tonight at Apres / Alys Beach! We hope to see you all soon for sunset toast!
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