How Many Republicans Does it Take to Change a Lightbulb? (yes, it?s a joke)

[Miss Kitty]

It kinda explains why it was so dim and dark for the last eight years...

and now we see the light?

knew you'd love this!

 

[Minnie]

How Many Democrats

How many democrats does it take to change a light blub?

6

One to blame the republicans for the light going out,
One to instill hope and change in the people through rhetoric,
One to deregulate the light bulb industry,
One to raise taxes so they can start a program to screw in light bulbs,
One to hit the "present" button,
One to?.
Oh wait, the republicans already changed it.

__________________
How many libertarians does it take to change a light bulb?

One to point out that the property owner should change it.
One to say the government should not.
One to claim government created the darkness in the first place.
One to argue Russell should not have switched on the light because he should have expected the bulb to burn out.
One to point out that changing light bulbs isn't in the constitution and that we shouldn't do anything about it.
Five to nominate Ron Paul as President of the Changing Light Bulb committee.
One to point out that competition on the light market would have prevented the problem.
Two to debate on whether changing the lightbulb is initiating force against said bulb.
And one to argue that we'd be better off in the dark anyway.

 

[Mermaid]

I love jokes where I can laugh at everybody. Equal opportunity victims of the punchline!

 

[steyou]

What? I thought we were supposed to use candles!

 

[Bob]

How many Republicans does it take to change a light blub.


1. One to deny that the light bulb needs to be changed
2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed.
3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb.
4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either for changing the light bulb or for darkness.
5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid/cost-plus contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb.
6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a stepladder under the
banner: ?Light Bulb Change Accomplished.?
7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark.
8. One to viciously smear #7.
9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light bulb changing policy all along.
10. Finally, Joe Lieberman to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing the light bulb and screwing the country.
11. Who needs a light blub when you can get all aglow just by thinking about Ronald Reagan?
12. The light bulb is not burned out. It is still operating at full capacity and accomplishing its mission. Do not listen to the peacenik critics who are telling you it is burned out. It is operating as it was designed!
13. Zero. Republicans do not change light bulbs, they hire low wage workers to do that. However, it takes a whole lot of Republicans to protest the illegal entry into the country of light bulb changers.

too good

 

[drivingtheview]

What? I thought we were supposed to use candles!

Not anymore!

BBC NEWS | Health | Candle use linked to cancer risk

 

[steyou]

Not anymore!

BBC NEWS | Health | Candle use linked to cancer risk

It's a plan. Get cancer and start end of life counseling.

 

[full time]

:funn:...now you need to find the Demo and Libert versions! Too funny!

Demo version

9 trillion to stimulate the dead bulb.

 

[Matt J]

Q: How many Right Wing Conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

A: 3

One to issue a press release that the bulb is not burned out and has a chance of recovery.
One to organize a protest that the government is condoning murder.
One congress member to drop everything to pass emergency legislation stopping the removal of the bulb.

 

[Lynnie]

This thread is absolutely hysterical!!