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An elderly Italian man lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, since the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Papa

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.
Love,
Vinnie

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Pop,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you,
Vinnie

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#704

Florida Mother Finds Italian Art History Magazine Stashed Underneath Teenager’s Mattress​


Saying she was ‘not angry, just disappointed,’ Florida mother Katie Rutherford said it was ‘time for a little chat’, after she discovered her son’s stash of Renaissance fine art mags while cleaning his bedroom.

The magazines, which are prohibited for minors in Florida, contained a series of full-body images of 16th Century marble masterpieces as well as detailed descriptions of their importance to the fine-art world.

A mortified Liam, 13, declared the magazines were not his and he was just storing them on behalf of a friend. “I haven’t even looked at them. I don’t even like 16th Century sculpture. I think the ancient Greek canon was much more important in the overall progression of the art form,” he said.

His mother confiscated the stash, saying she would not have that sort of dangerous material in her house. “Use your mattress for storing your guns, not fine art magazines please,” she said.
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#708
As a bass player I resemble this remark!
Ah, causing flashback memories of something about tuning a fish.
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#709
The best things in life are free."
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A Kleptomaniac
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Christian Man Persecuted Simply For Driving 90 Miles Per Hour In School Zone. - The Onion
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#717
I called the travel agency and ask them to book me a trip to one of those countries no one has ever heard of where they speak languages no one speaks and they hung up one me.:dunno:
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#7262
I’m not really into these types of movies, but the way the production company has used the christofacist anti-woke freak out as reviews for the film has me both amused and interested.
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