Proper Grammar
On my 66th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my wife.
The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man
living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a
wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being
persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my ticket to
the medicine man and wondered what would happen next.
The old man slowly, methodically produced a potion,
handed it to me, and with a grip on my shoulder, warned,
"This is powerful medicine and
it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then
say '1-2-3. 'When you do that, you will become more
manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform
long as you want."
I was encouraged... As I walked away, I turned and asked,
"How do I stop the medicine from
working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,' he
responded. "But when she does, the medicine will not
work again until the next full moon."
I was very eager to see if it worked so I went home, showered,
shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my
wife to join me in the bedroom. When she came in, I took off
my clothes and said, "1-2-3!"
Immediately, I was the
manliest of men. My wife was excited and began throwing off
her clothes. And then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition!
ONE COULD END UP WITH A DANGLING PARTICIPLE!!
On my 66th birthday, I got a gift certificate from my wife.
The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man
living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a
wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being
persuaded, I drove to the reservation, handed my ticket to
the medicine man and wondered what would happen next.
The old man slowly, methodically produced a potion,
handed it to me, and with a grip on my shoulder, warned,
"This is powerful medicine and
it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then
say '1-2-3. 'When you do that, you will become more
manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform
long as you want."
I was encouraged... As I walked away, I turned and asked,
"How do I stop the medicine from
working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,' he
responded. "But when she does, the medicine will not
work again until the next full moon."
I was very eager to see if it worked so I went home, showered,
shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited my
wife to join me in the bedroom. When she came in, I took off
my clothes and said, "1-2-3!"
Immediately, I was the
manliest of men. My wife was excited and began throwing off
her clothes. And then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"
And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition!
ONE COULD END UP WITH A DANGLING PARTICIPLE!!
