The Husband Store

[kathydwells]

I kindly looked the other way!

I tried, I really tried.

 

[drunkkenartist]

Don't worry, y'all didn't miss anything. I knew after the third floor that they were all gay.

Of course I ended up in the Bargain Basement, Red Tag, Blue Light special.

Or was that Blue Tag and Red Light Special?

And apparently a joke so nice, we ran it twice!

dka

 

[Bob]

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman
may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a
description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of
the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may
choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next
floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor
the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and
Help With Housework.

'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with
Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign
reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this
floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to
please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store
just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

Your avatar looks like my dream date, but I don't like the part at the end where she breaks my neck with her greyhound-like legs. Painful!

 

[NoHall]

Don't worry, y'all didn't miss anything. I knew after the third floor that they were all gay.

Of course I ended up in the Bargain Basement, Red Tag, Blue Light special.

Or was that Blue Tag and Red Light Special?

And apparently a joke so nice, we ran it twice!

dka

Darlin', you're a bargain at any price!

 

[Matt J]

Don't worry, y'all didn't miss anything. I knew after the third floor that they were all gay.

Of course I ended up in the Bargain Basement, Red Tag, Blue Light special.

Or was that Blue Tag and Red Light Special?

And apparently a joke so nice, we ran it twice!

dka

Hi, I'm from the choir, and you must be the preacher?

 

[LightWorker]

Don't worry, y'all didn't miss anything. I knew after the third floor that they were all gay.

Of course I ended up in the Bargain Basement, Red Tag, Blue Light special.

Or was that Blue Tag and Red Light Special?

And apparently a joke so nice, we ran it twice!

dka

Hi, I'm from the choir, and you must be the preacher?

Amen
​

 

[Teresa Cline]

I thought it was twice as funny the second time!

 

[JUL]

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman
may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a
description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of
the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may
choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next
floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor
the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and
Help With Housework.

'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with
Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign
reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this
floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to
please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store
just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

I just want to know if there was a clearance sign hanging on the door and in the window...otherwise I'm not sure if any one would go in

 

[Smiling JOe]

I just want to know if there was a clearance sign hanging on the door and in the window...otherwise I'm not sure if any one would go in

You must be referring to the New Wives Store.

I wonder if there is a Slightly Used Wives Store, where they are over the desire to get married.

 

[Biff]

:rofl::funn: