Ok, I need the help of some of the gulls on here. My sister-in-law just called me and is planning a birthday party for my mom who will be 80 next Sunday. She does not know about the party but knows my SIL and her two daughters are coming. She already is having a DVD made of family pictures that will be shown continuously throughout the party. My sister-in-law was asking what she could get her for her birthday besides the DVD she is having done. I could not help her there as I will have a difficult enough time thinking of something for her myself. But she wants party suggestions also, as to what to serve. My aunt is making a pound cake but I do not really care for her pound cake and there will be frozen yogurt. She has mentioned a vegetable tray and fruit tray. But I think there should be some other kind of cake. And what about a birthday banner? I do not know how she thinks this will be pulled off with her right in the apartment. There may be 10 to 12 people. Will only be a small party. She is going to be calling me back later in the week. If anyone can come up with some good suggestions within the next day or two for me I would appreciate it. I am sure my SIL is not happy with me as I was of no help to her. I have not even been told of who will be coming, my aunt told me I was included in the decision making but I have not even been given a partial idea of who will be there other than my mom and dad and me and my aunt and my SIL and her two daughters and another aunt and uncle, and my mom's favorite nephew. Sorry I am so long winded but help! :blink:
Edited
Replies
75
SoWal Expert
:clap: My grandfather loved this at 80, but most importantly, he is just happy when everyone is together.
Your grandfather's too cute! :wub:
SoWal InsiderAuthor
:clap: My grandfather loved this at 80, but most importantly, he is just happy when everyone is together.
My father gets irritated with alot of people around so we think 11 will be all he will tolerate. His alzheimers makes him do and say some things that are not very nice. My aunt was over one Sunday afternoon and it was just me and her and my mom and dad. I left at 3:00 and he followed me into the hall and told me why don't you take her with you, referring to my aunt. So I do not know how he will take 11 people. I wish there was some surprise person I could think of to invite that she hasn't seen in years.
SoWal Insider
Your grandfather's too cute! :wub:
:wave: Now what to do for when he turns 100? :idontno: We've done all of the above ideas already.
You think Julia Roberts will call him? :lol:
beats on hood
:wave: Now what to do for when he turns 100? :idontno: We've done all of the above ideas already.Maybe Willard will! And Smucker's will send some jelly!
You think Julia Roberts will call him? :lol:
SoWal Expert
:wave: Now what to do for when he turns 100? :idontno: We've done all of the above ideas already.
You think Julia Roberts will call him? :lol:
I bet she would. Just ask.😀
SoWal Insider
My father gets irritated with alot of people around so we think 11 will be all he will tolerate. His alzheimers makes him do and say some things that are not very nice. My aunt was over one Sunday afternoon and it was just me and her and my mom and dad. I left at 3:00 and he followed me into the hall and told me why don't you take her with you, referring to my aunt. So I do not know how he will take 11 people. I wish there was some surprise person I could think of to invite that she hasn't seen in years.
Maybe someone can take him somewhere he likes for a while after being at the party for a short time for pictures and such? :idontno:
SoWal InsiderAuthor
Maybe someone can take him somewhere he likes for a while after being at the party for a short time for pictures and such? :idontno:
We never know how he will act. I can always tell when things are not going well by mom's voice. And so can everyone else close to her. I guess we will just wait and see how he does. He may surprise me. But that is a good suggestion. Thanks Mango.
beats on hood
My father gets irritated with alot of people around so we think 11 will be all he will tolerate. His alzheimers makes him do and say some things that are not very nice. My aunt was over one Sunday afternoon and it was just me and her and my mom and dad. I left at 3:00 and he followed me into the hall and told me why don't you take her with you, referring to my aunt. So I do not know how he will take 11 people. I wish there was some surprise person I could think of to invite that she hasn't seen in years.I can totally relate to that. My mom has Alz's and got ticked off yesterday because her neighbor died and the family got together after the funeral. Mom said, "I can't believe they're having a party. If you have a party after I die, I'll come back and haunt you." I said, "Mom, they're all just getting together after the funeral because they haven't seen each other in a while. Look at all of the out-of-town license plates." She said, "Well, nobody is crying. If y'all do that when I die, I'll take that table over there, raise it up in the air, and let it fall and kill you all." Alzheimer's is really a sad disease. It's more than just memory loss, as we are learning.
That's why you should keep it simple. Less agitating and he won't remember it anyhow. Just make some memories for the family because it gets worse.
Beach Fanatic
I've been thinking about RO's "stripper" idea...and in the "sense" that WE might think it's funny & many of our parents generation would NOT...it still got me thinking...
MY parents (who like yours would be HORRIFIED to DEATH by an actual CLOTHING stripper) would probably get a kick out of a "STRIPPiNG away the years" theme...which could be a "tasteful & respectable" twist on stripping and also a "newish" way to present "this is your life--skipping down memory lane" theme as DD suggests....
*wrap gifts or compile photos in a spiral or tear-away fashion...barbershop pole
*would hints & bits of the "vaudeville strip song" be offensive to them?...for instance did they like the movie Gypsy (Gypsy Rose Lee)?
FYI....In case you need...Some of my parents' favorite old time songs you can download:
1. I'm looking over a 4 Leaf Clover (THEIR song!)
2. YES! We have no bananas! (Spike Jones?)
3. Mare-sy Doats & Doe-sy Doats (?)
4. Boogy Woogy Bugle Boy of Company B (Anderson Sisters)
5. Que Sera Sera (Doris Day)
6. Rock of Ages
7. The Old Rugged Cross
8. Amazing Grace
9. Tiny Bubbles
10. Lawrence Welk & Guy Lombardo stuff.
Other gift ideas:
1. Old Classic Movies from their dating days. (my folks like old John Wayne westerns)
I'll keep thinkin'....
MY parents (who like yours would be HORRIFIED to DEATH by an actual CLOTHING stripper) would probably get a kick out of a "STRIPPiNG away the years" theme...which could be a "tasteful & respectable" twist on stripping and also a "newish" way to present "this is your life--skipping down memory lane" theme as DD suggests....
*wrap gifts or compile photos in a spiral or tear-away fashion...barbershop pole
*would hints & bits of the "vaudeville strip song" be offensive to them?...for instance did they like the movie Gypsy (Gypsy Rose Lee)?
FYI....In case you need...Some of my parents' favorite old time songs you can download:
1. I'm looking over a 4 Leaf Clover (THEIR song!)
2. YES! We have no bananas! (Spike Jones?)
3. Mare-sy Doats & Doe-sy Doats (?)
4. Boogy Woogy Bugle Boy of Company B (Anderson Sisters)
5. Que Sera Sera (Doris Day)
6. Rock of Ages
7. The Old Rugged Cross
8. Amazing Grace
9. Tiny Bubbles
10. Lawrence Welk & Guy Lombardo stuff.
Other gift ideas:
1. Old Classic Movies from their dating days. (my folks like old John Wayne westerns)
I'll keep thinkin'....
Beach Fanatic
Maybe someone can take him somewhere he likes for a while after being at the party for a short time for pictures and such? :idontno:
This is a good idea Mango. My grandmother had alzheimers and it's very hard especially for the primary caregiver. Lady...maybe one of the nicest gifts your Mom could receive would be for one of you that she trusts (AND on that day whoever your father will feel "safe" with) to quietly occupy & care for him (elsewhere?) so your Mom can "let go" and have a couple of hours JUST FOR HER. All the more reason to give her gifts that she can "GO BACK" and enjoy later...memory gifts...pictures....music. And gifts that are "service to her" gifts for future...a cooked/delivered meal, a day of beauty (administered by a daughter or granddaughter so she doesn't have to leave your Dad if she's uncomfortable with that)....
Beach Fanatic
Now those are some grayt ideas:clap:
SoWal InsiderAuthor
This is a good idea Mango. My grandmother had alzheimers and it's very hard especially for the primary caregiver. Lady...maybe one of the nicest gifts your Mom could receive would be for one of you that she trusts (AND on that day whoever your father will feel "safe" with) to quietly occupy & care for him (elsewhere?) so your Mom can "let go" and have a couple of hours JUST FOR HER. All the more reason to give her gifts that she can "GO BACK" and enjoy later...memory gifts...pictures....music. And gifts that are "service to her" gifts for future...a cooked/delivered meal, a day of beauty (administered by a daughter or granddaughter so she doesn't have to leave your Dad if she's uncomfortable with that)....
Maybe I need to get her a day at a day spa for a facial and massage!!! You think she is too old for that???
Beach Fanatic
And gifts that are "service to her" gifts for future...a cooked/delivered meal, a day of beauty (administered by a daughter or granddaughter so she doesn't have to leave your Dad if she's uncomfortable with that)....
Great idea! My sister in law's family gave her grandmother a calendar filled in with names of family members who would come over on the weekends & clean the house for her. I think these visits ended up being more about socializing than cleaning but her gram really enjoyed having the company every weekend!
Beach Lover
FYI....In case you need...Some of my parents' favorite old time songs you can download:
1. I'm looking over a 4 Leaf Clover (THEIR song!)
2. YES! We have no bananas! (Spike Jones?)
3. Mare-sy Doats & Doe-sy Doats (?)
4. Boogy Woogy Bugle Boy of Company B (Anderson Sisters)
5. Que Sera Sera (Doris Day)
6. Rock of Ages
7. The Old Rugged Cross
8. Amazing Grace
9. Tiny Bubbles
10. Lawrence Welk & Guy Lombardo stuff.
:clap: Oh, this brings back memories of my grandmother. She used to sing an old song from her younger years to me when I was a child - and it is #3 on your list. It is actually "mares eat oats and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy". I have never met anyone else who has heard of that, but she would sing that song and just laugh! Thanks, Dune-Ahh for the memories.
1. I'm looking over a 4 Leaf Clover (THEIR song!)
2. YES! We have no bananas! (Spike Jones?)
3. Mare-sy Doats & Doe-sy Doats (?)
4. Boogy Woogy Bugle Boy of Company B (Anderson Sisters)
5. Que Sera Sera (Doris Day)
6. Rock of Ages
7. The Old Rugged Cross
8. Amazing Grace
9. Tiny Bubbles
10. Lawrence Welk & Guy Lombardo stuff.
:clap: Oh, this brings back memories of my grandmother. She used to sing an old song from her younger years to me when I was a child - and it is #3 on your list. It is actually "mares eat oats and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy". I have never met anyone else who has heard of that, but she would sing that song and just laugh! Thanks, Dune-Ahh for the memories.
Beach Fanatic
Maybe I need to get her a day at a day spa for a facial and massage!!! You think she is too old for that???
I don't think she's too old!! At 74 my Mom still finds trips to the spa a special treat (although she can't have massages due to blood clots & being on coumadin) particularly because it's NOT something she will book for herself. Smaller trips of 1 treatment at a time might work better for her than an entire day...she may be afraid to leave your Dad for an entire day.
beats on hood
Maybe I need to get her a day at a day spa for a facial and massage!!! You think she is too old for that???Spa is a grayt idea. No matter how demented her behavior gets, Mom loves it when people tell her she's pretty. She loves having manicures, pedicures, and having her hair done.
Edited
Beach Fanatic
FYI....In case you need...Some of my parents' favorite old time songs you can download:
1. I'm looking over a 4 Leaf Clover (THEIR song!)
2. YES! We have no bananas! (Spike Jones?)
3. Mare-sy Doats & Doe-sy Doats (?)
4. Boogy Woogy Bugle Boy of Company B (Anderson Sisters)
5. Que Sera Sera (Doris Day)
6. Rock of Ages
7. The Old Rugged Cross
8. Amazing Grace
9. Tiny Bubbles
10. Lawrence Welk & Guy Lombardo stuff.
:clap: Oh, this brings back memories of my grandmother. She used to sing an old song from her younger years to me when I was a child - and it is #3 on your list. It is actually "mares eat oats and does eat oats, and little lambs eat ivy". I have never met anyone else who has heard of that, but she would sing that song and just laugh! Thanks, Dune-Ahh for the memories.
YES!!! My mother would BRIBE us to be good by promising to sing Maresy Doats as a SPECIAL TREAT. She too would just LAUGH & sing it faster & faster so all the words ran together nonsensically. She also did some kind of clapping routine with it. We LOVED IT & would plead & plead for her to sing it....but as a woman of "disciplined restraint" she always kept it as a rare & special treat! She could make the simplest little things fun. My mother made dusting the house into a "game" for us by playing hide-the-thimble!! Downright sneaky...:wub:
fartblossom
my mother would rather have a stripper than a day at the spa 😀 but then again she's only 66.
for my mean ole granny who just passed away this year at 212, ok she was 96 but it seemed like 212, anywho - i always got her something that either was shaped like a penis or had a penis on it. like penis pasta, lipstick etc. they were her favorite gifts. or maybe it was always the money taped to the bottom..:idontno:
for my mean ole granny who just passed away this year at 212, ok she was 96 but it seemed like 212, anywho - i always got her something that either was shaped like a penis or had a penis on it. like penis pasta, lipstick etc. they were her favorite gifts. or maybe it was always the money taped to the bottom..:idontno:
SoWal Expert
My grandmothers (both 80 and then some) are always the most pleased by seeing their family, especially the grandkids, and "useful" or edible gifts. I love the suggestion of having family members fill in a calendar w/ events/chores they'll do for her.
We also do family photos at every major event - grandma w/ her kids, grandma and the grandkids etc so she can show them off.
We also do family photos at every major event - grandma w/ her kids, grandma and the grandkids etc so she can show them off.
Beach Fanatic
ooh audie :rolling: :rolling: :rolling:
My grandma would just die if I gave her penis pasta :roll: ...maybe not. She is 7th Day Adventist though.
but she probably would :wub: the moolah taped to the bottom
Your peeps sound like so much funn.
My grandma would just die if I gave her penis pasta :roll: ...maybe not. She is 7th Day Adventist though.
but she probably would :wub: the moolah taped to the bottom
Your peeps sound like so much funn.
Beach Fanatic
We just gave my mother a surprise 80th party in March. As my gift, I sent letters to family and friends asking them to write a special memory of Mother. I sent stamped, self-addressed envelopes with a decorative paper and so it would be easy to return the letter. I also gave my email for those who preferred to send a reply that was. I put them in a scrapbook with a variety of famliy photos. She was so honored by the stories and the lovely comments. I am glad she was able to hear/read the good things everyone had to say about her. I think too often, we wait too late to tell someone how important they are. As for food we did cake, of course, country ham muffins, chocolate dipped strawberries, and finger sandwiches. Regardless what you do, just enjoy the day!
SoWal InsiderAuthor
Spa is a grayt idea. No matter how demented her behavior gets, Mom loves it when people tell her she's pretty. She loves having manicures, pedicures, and having her hair done.
Maybe my dad will behave during this. He will probably be jealous of her getting all of the attention. It's bad he has gotten in the state he is in. But sometimes he seems sharp as a tack still but he also gets smart mouthed sometimes also and pouts.
fartblossom
ooh audie :rolling: :rolling: :rolling:
My grandma would just die if I gave her penis pasta :roll: ...maybe not. She is 7th Day Adventist though.
but she probably would :wub: the moolah taped to the bottom
Your peeps sound like so much funn.
i was thinking more along the lines of nuts 😀
SoWal InsiderAuthor
OK, I was looking on the internet for day spas in Memphis and found Gould's Day Spa and they offer a one hour stress reducing facial for $75.00 and this place is not far from where my mom and dad live. My sister-in-law will be calling back tonight and I will see what she thinks about this. Sounds like a plan to me.
This is the one I am looking at:
Stress Solution Spa Facial
(Approximately 1 Hour) $75
A luxurious facial designed to soothe and soften your complexion while de-stressing your entire body. You?ll enjoy a gentle, yet thorough cleansing, a soothing Aromatherapy Oil massage for the face, neck and shoulders, relaxing steam inhalation therapy, and a customized Bioelements mask laced with calming plant extracts. Signs of stress will be replaced by renewed, glowing skin. This is the ideal treatment for sensitive skin needing extremely gentle care.
This is the one I am looking at:
Stress Solution Spa Facial
(Approximately 1 Hour) $75
A luxurious facial designed to soothe and soften your complexion while de-stressing your entire body. You?ll enjoy a gentle, yet thorough cleansing, a soothing Aromatherapy Oil massage for the face, neck and shoulders, relaxing steam inhalation therapy, and a customized Bioelements mask laced with calming plant extracts. Signs of stress will be replaced by renewed, glowing skin. This is the ideal treatment for sensitive skin needing extremely gentle care.
fartblossom
that sounds nice lady
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