Okay here it goes. You all know we have an adorable little boy that you have seen pictures of.
The problem is, he's almost 2 and he still wakes up every night at about 11 and refuses to sleep in his bed. We asked the doctor what to do and he said to let him scream for about ten minutes and then go tell him hat "everything's okay" and let him scream for another ten minutes and repeat until he's sleep. But this kid will not give up. He can shake the windows in the house when he screams.
We usually give in at about 2 or 3 am and put him in the bed with us so we can try to get some sleep. I'm sure you all are familiar with how a 2 year old sleeps in the bed with you - sideways. His head is usually digging into my ribcage and his feet are kicking Mama in the side of the head.
Peapod, you have 4 so I know you have an answer to this one....
Replies
95
Meow
The Nanny deal I saw went something like this...(start on the weekend)...
Put Walker to bed and with lights out and one parent sits by the bed...say nothing, just be there...start inching out, until you are out the door and "hopefully" child is asleep. I know this sounds simplistic, but it did work. Somebody else needs to fill in the blanks if I have omitted a step.
Put Walker to bed and with lights out and one parent sits by the bed...say nothing, just be there...start inching out, until you are out the door and "hopefully" child is asleep. I know this sounds simplistic, but it did work. Somebody else needs to fill in the blanks if I have omitted a step.
Beach Fanatic
The Nanny deal I saw went something like this...(start on the weekend)...
Put Walker to bed and with lights out and one parent sits by the bed...say nothing, just be there...start inching out, until you are out the door and "hopefully" child is asleep. I know this sounds simplistic, but it did work. Somebody else needs to fill in the blanks if I have omitted a step.
STEP 1: Giving Valium to the parents.
SoWal Insider
STEP 1: Giving Valium to the parents.
Mother's helper!! :funn:
:rofl: 
Beach FanaticAuthor
The Nanny deal I saw went something like this...(start on the weekend)...
Put Walker to bed and with lights out and one parent sits by the bed...say nothing, just be there...start inching out, until you are out the door and "hopefully" child is asleep. I know this sounds simplistic, but it did work. Somebody else needs to fill in the blanks if I have omitted a step.
We tried that the other night.
He had his arm sticking through the rails on his bed and his hand was latched on to my wife's shirt. He eventually fell asleeep and she had to twist herself out of the shirt so he could keep holding on to it. It was so dam funny.
got any pics?
Mother's helper!! :funn:
Prince Valium :funn:
SoWal Expert
STEP 1: Giving Valium to the parents.Alternate STEP 1: Give Valium to the kid.
Just kidding - I could not resist.
SoWal Expert
The Nanny deal I saw went something like this...(start on the weekend)...
Put Walker to bed and with lights out and one parent sits by the bed...say nothing, just be there...start inching out, until you are out the door and "hopefully" child is asleep. I know this sounds simplistic, but it did work. Somebody else needs to fill in the blanks if I have omitted a step.
I was thinking this very same thing as I was reading this thread. You and SJ must have watched the same episodes I did.
Beach Fanatic
Alternate STEP 1: Give Valium to the kid.:nono1:
Just kidding - I could not resist.
Beach Fanatic
LL...I feel for you. My first did this. Eventually, we found it easier to just let him sleep with us for awhile. Sometimes in the middle of the night, we would carry him back to his bed. One thing that did work for a while....
We let him pick out his "big boy sheets" Some stupid cartoon thing that did not match his room at all...but he loved them and wanted to sleep in them. Might give it a try. (BTW, he did wind up finding his own way to his bed, he's 11 now and sometimes I miss those snuggling nights!)
We let him pick out his "big boy sheets" Some stupid cartoon thing that did not match his room at all...but he loved them and wanted to sleep in them. Might give it a try. (BTW, he did wind up finding his own way to his bed, he's 11 now and sometimes I miss those snuggling nights!)
bean
We tried that the other night.
He had his arm sticking through the rails on his bed and his hand was latched on to my wife's shirt. He eventually fell asleeep and she had to twist herself out of the shirt so he could keep holding on to it. It was so dam funny.
Oh, I've so been there. My biggest parenting mistake of all is laying down with them or staying in their room until they fell asleep. UGH. KD was right on with her post. You may have to go through 3 nights of heck but it will be worth it and if I could do anything over again I'd do it. I totally know what you mean about the cold or illness setbacks though. LL, you just have to do what's best for little LL and your family. Good luck.
percy
Alternate STEP 1: Give Valium to the kid.Shhhhhh...SJ! Don't spill my secrets.
Just kidding - I could not resist.
Beach Fanatic
We never had any problem with older son.
Younger son (now 16) was a different story. He did not know how to get *himself* to sleep. He would wake up throughout the night, wanting us.
A sleep-deprived parent is not at the top of his/her game.
We got the book by Dr. Ferber. It basically told me what I already knew in the back of my mind. Our scenario was pretty much as KathyD described.
You have to let them cry. Wait awhile, then you go and comfort. Let cry some more. Wait a bit more time, then go and comfort. And so on.
We got through it.
Some parents advocate The Family Bed and there is also the pallet solution etc etc. I guess whatever works. All I know is that I really Need My Sleep.
I can't do my job as a parent when I am only half there.
Good luck!
Younger son (now 16) was a different story. He did not know how to get *himself* to sleep. He would wake up throughout the night, wanting us.
A sleep-deprived parent is not at the top of his/her game.
We got the book by Dr. Ferber. It basically told me what I already knew in the back of my mind. Our scenario was pretty much as KathyD described.
You have to let them cry. Wait awhile, then you go and comfort. Let cry some more. Wait a bit more time, then go and comfort. And so on.
We got through it.
Some parents advocate The Family Bed and there is also the pallet solution etc etc. I guess whatever works. All I know is that I really Need My Sleep.
I can't do my job as a parent when I am only half there.
Good luck!
SoWal Insider
LL how did it go last night? Thinking of you. Sometimes the hardest thing is getting on the same page with the spouse on how to handle these things. And as kathydwells so aptly put it -- as did pea to the pod -- every kid is different.
Have to admit that my 5 y.o. crawls in bed with us almost every night between 1 and 3 in the morning. He doesn't get in the way too much (king sized bed) and rarely wakes us up when he comes in, and never on purpose. I think it's OK because it won't last forever.
Not sure what will happen when our toddler is out of his crib and ready for a bed. I anticipate that will be a battle, and it's coming up soon. Thank goodness for baby gates! We will not have 4 in our bed. If the little one starts coming in, we will have to tell the big one he can't come in. The key here is they know it is OUR bed and not theirs. 5 year old comes in only because we don't mind, and he knows it!
Have to admit that my 5 y.o. crawls in bed with us almost every night between 1 and 3 in the morning. He doesn't get in the way too much (king sized bed) and rarely wakes us up when he comes in, and never on purpose. I think it's OK because it won't last forever.
Not sure what will happen when our toddler is out of his crib and ready for a bed. I anticipate that will be a battle, and it's coming up soon. Thank goodness for baby gates! We will not have 4 in our bed. If the little one starts coming in, we will have to tell the big one he can't come in. The key here is they know it is OUR bed and not theirs. 5 year old comes in only because we don't mind, and he knows it!Beach FanaticAuthor
LL how did it go last night? Thinking of you. Sometimes the hardest thing is getting on the same page with the spouse on how to handle these things. And as kathydwells so aptly put it -- as did pea to the pod -- every kid is different.
Have to admit that my 5 y.o. crawls in bed with us almost every night between 1 and 3 in the morning. He doesn't get in the way too much (king sized bed) and rarely wakes us up when he comes in, and never on purpose. I think it's OK because it won't last forever.
Last night, my wife went to bed early and I stayed up watching the Rose Bowl. I got in bed around 12 and sure enough, at 12:15, he started screaming. I got him back to sleep and crashed.
When we woke up this morning, he was in bed right between us. One of us put him in the bed with us but neither of us remember doing it. Weird.
Christini Zambini
Thanks for the advice folks. One thing that keeps biting us is that once we get him to sleep in his bed, he'll get a cold or something where we need to keep a close eye on him. So we wind up starting all over again. We'll figure it out. Where can I find those earplugs?
LL, once you get Little Man to fall asleep on his own, you will be better able to determine when his middle-of-the-night cries are something serious that needs checking. Its like the boy who cried wolf. Since he cries every night, right now you don't know if the reason is serious or not. Our Little Man is 17 mos. and luckily has always been a great sleeper. We can lay him down awake and he'll go right to sleep. However, he does ocassionally cry instead of fall asleep and when he does this, we know that something is wrong--his nightlight is not on, he threw his blankie out of the crib, etc. Very rarely he'll wake up in the middle of the night crying and at these times, too, we know something is wrong--nightmare, sick, blankie out of the crib, etc. It will actually give you peace of mind to know that he will communicate to you when he really needs you and you won't feel that you need to hover over him if he has a little cold or something. That way, you will all get more and better sleep.
My advice (after 4 kids) is to nip it in the bud now. Let him cry it out, as others have advised, and in a few days, things will be fine. It is so hard to do, but be strong! A bonus for his being able to fall asleep on his own is that you and your wife can go out on a date and a babysitter will be able to get Little Man to bed with no problems!
Beach FanaticAuthor
LL, once you get Little Man to fall asleep on his own, you will be better able to determine when his middle-of-the-night cries are something serious that needs checking. Its like the boy who cried wolf. Since he cries every night, right now you don't know if the reason is serious or not. Our Little Man is 17 mos. and luckily has always been a great sleeper. We can lay him down awake and he'll go right to sleep. However, he does ocassionally cry instead of fall asleep and when he does this, we know that something is wrong--his nightlight is not on, he threw his blankie out of the crib, etc. Very rarely he'll wake up in the middle of the night crying and at these times, too, we know something is wrong--nightmare, sick, blankie out of the crib, etc. It will actually give you peace of mind to know that he will communicate to you when he really needs you and you won't feel that you need to hover over him if he has a little cold or something. That way, you will all get more and better sleep.
My advice (after 4 kids) is to nip it in the bud now. Let him cry it out, as others have advised, and in a few days, things will be fine. It is so hard to do, but be strong! A bonus for his being able to fall asleep on his own is that you and your wife can go out on a date and a babysitter will be able to get Little Man to bed with no problems!
I think we're going to wait for a long weekend and let him scream it out. Mr. and Mrs. LL NEED a date.
Beach Fanatic
Just remembered a friend having a similar problem...It turned out her child was a diabetic, at 2 years. May want to have the doctor check out the child to be sure there are no health issues.
Beach FanaticAuthor
Just remembered a friend having a similar problem...It turned out her child was a diabetic, at 2 years. May want to have the doctor check out the child to be sure there are no health issues.
:shock:
Runs in the family, too.
Beach Fanatic
Let us know if it is something other than typical child rearing.
Christini Zambini
Just remembered a friend having a similar problem...It turned out her child was a diabetic, at 2 years. May want to have the doctor check out the child to be sure there are no health issues.
The doctor is the person who originally gave LL the advice to the Little Man cry it out. I'm sure the doctor feels the child is in perfect health.
Admin
Whenever I have cried at night it was because I needed something.
Usually love and attention.
Usually love and attention.
Funnkalicious
Whenever I have cried at night it was because I needed something.me too. or to be changed.
Usually love and attention.
Admin
me too. or to be changed.
Never change.
fartblossom
i sometimes cry out because i don't wanna go back to work !
Beach Fanatic
I have to pipe in...4 girls, all different...have to admit #4 went to bed in our bed many, many nights...just easier and she was so cute and sweet! Many nights all the kids would be in our bed or on the floor or in each other's beds. My family jokes about us never knowing who will be sleeping where. They are all very secure and independent. They got lots of love! That is what makes them secure. I also believe whole heartedly in the discipline and in the SUPER NANNY! She shows what a small amount of consistent discipline can do for a family. It should be required viewing for every parent or parent to be. The perfect solution....a combination of love and discipline for the little LL. You'll do just fine and he will be in college one day flunking chemistry. Oh sorry...nuther thread.
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