I'm About to Go Broke!

Try this:

KID: Mom/Dad can I have some money to go out to breakfast with my friends?

MOM/DAD: No.

The End.


(It worked for my parents)

I like that!

I have to add that my girls have always been the hardest workers you could find. They have always known that if they really wanted something they had to work for it. Now they DO insist on buying me dinner and whatever ALL the time. Seems kind of unfair since I couldn't always buy for them like that. They are so sweet!

I like that!

I have to add that my girls have always been the hardest workers you could find. They have always known that if they really wanted something they had to work for it. Now they DO insist on buying me dinner and whatever ALL the time. Seems kind of unfair since I couldn't always buy for them like that. They are so sweet!

from what I can tell from your family, you have a special relationship with your girls and this is the most important thing of all. this is what I want to achieve most of all with my little one.

from what I can tell from your family, you have a special relationship with your girls and this is the most important thing of all. this is what I want to achieve most of all with my little one.

I agree completely. You do have a very special, loving relationship. It is evident in your posts about your daughters. You've done a wonderful job, steele mama ~

I agree completely. You do have a very special, loving relationship. It is evident in your posts about your daughters. You've done a wonderful job, steele mama ~

Grace, grace, wonderful grace!!!

:clap_1: :clap_1: :clap_1: :clap_1:

Thats the way my parents were also. Latley my wife and I have been having a little bit of money problems or lack of. My father saw a little stress in me and sent me a check for 500 bucks. I ripped up the check and threw it away. I havnt needed my parent money since I was in my teens and Im not going to start now. My folks taught me better than that and they started when I was young. I respect that they are retired and should not have to support me, hell I should be sending them 500 bucks and supporting them by now.

this hits so close to home, because every time i see my pop, he always asks me if i need gas money.... a month or so ago i was telling my mom how short i was on funds, and admittedly exaggerating a bit. a short time later my pop called from work to get my bank account number to deposit money for me because mom told him i didn't have any money for groceries :roll: i asked him why he always wants to give me money, he said because he knows i'd never take it. he doesn't offer to my sis tho .....

I like that!

I have to add that my girls have always been the hardest workers you could find. They have always known that if they really wanted something they had to work for it. Now they DO insist on buying me dinner and whatever ALL the time. Seems kind of unfair since I couldn't always buy for them like that. They are so sweet!

my dad was telling me that last week at my grandma's funeral they saw some people i used to work for, and my old boss was telling mom i was the best, hardest-working employee she had ever had, my pop said mom was grinning from ear to ear after that. she said it made her feel like she had done a good job with us girls....

This is a great thread all around. JR thanks for starting it.

Thank you. I'm sure I did ease up on him this summer and hand out $$ a little too freely w/o realilizing it immediately.

Hey, it happens -- I've let my 6 yo watch entirely too much TV in the past month and now I am paying for it as he transitions back into school and responsibility. I think we are all guilty of backtracking from time to time. Luckily my default word is "No," (and what SHELLY said about starting when they are toddlers is SOOOOO true!! I've seen the evidence pro and con!) so he knows he can't get away with too much lip or grief. But the next week or two is going to be rough ...

JR here is something I read in this month's Money magazine. I can't find the link to it on their website but it is titled "Get Financially Fit for back to School." The first two points apply to your situation and are basically what you have heard here. But it always helps me to have "instructions" because emotions take over from time to time when they are your own kids and it is hard to be tough and see things clearly!

1) NEGOTIATE THE BUDGET.
Set Shopping Boundaries: Familes plan to spend an average of $527 this season on clothes, supplies and tech, 20 percent more than last year, according to the National Retail Federation and BIGresearch. To keep your own tab in check, take care of the essentials first, then give your teen a budget for extras and stick to it. She can decide whether to blow money on one pair of designer jeans -- or to buy three pairs of Levis.
Let your kid lead: Ask your teen to create a list of his weekly expenses such as lunch, gas and entertainment, then decide how much you will contribute. Again, leave the spending decisions to your kid. Overloading on snacks every day means the weekend movie may have to wait.

2) TEACH MONEY MANAGEMENT
Kick off a saving habit: Want your kid to learn to save? Carrie Schwab Pomerantz, president of the Charles Schwab Foundation, suggests requiring a high school student to stash at least 10 percent of any income in a savings account. By the time she gets that first paycheck after college, saving should be second nature.
Ease into plastic: A recent Schwab study confirmed that teens know plenty about spending money on debit and credit cards but little about maintaining a positive bank balance and adding up compound interest. Link a debit card to your teen's savings account as a training tool, and make sure he tracks his balance.

At that age, the thing you might want to do is set a monthly budget. Set an amount of $ that is available to him/her each month and be firm. The teen has to make choices on how he/she will allocate this money (prior approval by parent of course). If the child goes under budget one month, then it might be added to the next months budget. If a "special circumstance" occurs and you allow him/her to go over budget one month, then they must realize that this will be deducted from the next months budget. This would do 2 things:

1. Allows you to set an amount certain for their spending money.
2. Helps the teen realize the value of money and the choices they make.

Now...I have made a serious post and my head is about to explode...later!

Great advice TFT and TripleB.

My son has learned this summer that if he buys 2 polos on sale at Rheul, that's less than one at full price. He was so excited to discover that. He'll soon learn more of these tips when he has to budget an allowance.

And TripleB, I love your signature!!

this hits so close to home, because every time i see my pop, he always asks me if i need gas money.... a month or so ago i was telling my mom how short i was on funds, and admittedly exaggerating a bit. a short time later my pop called from work to get my bank account number to deposit money for me because mom told him i didn't have any money for groceries :roll: i asked him why he always wants to give me money, he said because he knows i'd never take it. he doesn't offer to my sis tho .....

That funny, my sister is the same way. She like to take the money and when she doesnt get it she complaines that no one will help her.:shock:
Shes a great person, I just think she takes advantage of my folks sometimes.

At that age, the thing you might want to do is set a monthly budget. Set an amount of $ that is available to him/her each month and be firm. The teen has to make choices on how he/she will allocate this money (prior approval by parent of course). If the child goes under budget one month, then it might be added to the next months budget. If a "special circumstance" occurs and you allow him/her to go over budget one month, then they must realize that this will be deducted from the next months budget. This would do 2 things:

1. Allows you to set an amount certain for their spending money.
2. Helps the teen realize the value of money and the choices they make.

Now...I have made a serious post and my head is about to explode...later!

WOW.....is this the TripleB I know and love? I didn't know you had it in you. I guess your profession helps though, huh. Now, come to my house and help me set up a budget for one Jesse!!!! I am proud of you there my friend!!!!

That funny, my sister is the same way. She like to take the money and when she doesnt get it she complaines that no one will help her.:shock:
Shes a great person, I just think she takes advantage of my folks sometimes.

Accepting $$ from parents as an adult is so weird to me. Unless you are in dire need or in poor health. When I was growing up my parents paid for most things and gave me an allowance. But as soon as I moved out at 18, I never got another dime. I never asked and they never offered. It just never occurred to me to ever expect it. When times were tough, I worked extra pt. time jobs at night. Everything my husband and I have, we've earned completely on our own. No monetary gifts either at Christmas. It does give you a sense of pride to be able to do it on your own. I am shocked to hear how many of my friends whose parents have given them the down payments for their homes or given them the new car for their 40th b.d.

This is a great thread all around. JR thanks for starting it.



Hey, it happens -- I've let my 6 yo watch entirely too much TV in the past month and now I am paying for it as he transitions back into school and responsibility.

I'm very guilty of this as well over the summer (and I have the hard evidence that too much TV contributes to juvenile delinquency. I am saying no to TV now and will keep it that way - next summer gotta come up with a different plan of action). also, I found myself buying him that little hot wheel or cheapo toy at Publix or wherever we went because he was with me so much over the summer (constantly), plus a few trips to the toy store for something special that he wanted. Suddenly, because of my saying yes to these items, he became an instant materialistic brat "I want a toy! now!". Saying no to this now too, and talking about appreciating what we have. we learn our lessons the hard way sometimes.

I'm very guilty of this as well over the summer (and I have the hard evidence that too much TV contributes to juvenile delinquency. I am saying no to TV now and will keep it that way - next summer gotta come up with a different plan of action). also, I found myself buying him that little hot wheel or cheapo toy at Publix or wherever we went because he was with me so much over the summer (constantly), plus a few trips to the toy store for something special that he wanted. Suddenly, because of my saying yes to these items, he became an instant materialistic brat "I want a toy! now!". Saying no to this now too, and talking about appreciating what we have. we learn our lessons the hard way sometimes.

Gosh are you me or what? DS No. 1 had a growth spurt in the past couple of weeks. Yesterday he goes to put his sneakers on (it's been sandals all summer) and they are too small! So after school we go get him nice new shoes. At Nordstrom. He's like, can I have a toy too? Just one toy? NOO!!!! We had the same conversation about how other kids don't have so much, blah blah blah. Maybe I should practice during my free time today: No. No. No. No. No. ...

I'm very guilty of this as well over the summer (and I have the hard evidence that too much TV contributes to juvenile delinquency. I am saying no to TV now and will keep it that way - next summer gotta come up with a different plan of action). also, I found myself buying him that little hot wheel or cheapo toy at Publix or wherever we went because he was with me so much over the summer (constantly), plus a few trips to the toy store for something special that he wanted. Suddenly, because of my saying yes to these items, he became an instant materialistic brat "I want a toy! now!". Saying no to this now too, and talking about appreciating what we have. we learn our lessons the hard way sometimes.

We've all been guilty of this. That's what's so ironic about some of the moralistic posts to this thread. ;-)
Don't we all wish we could be the perfect parent? It is so hard. There is a reason, for me anyway, for only having one child!

Accepting $$ from parents as an adult is so weird to me. Unless you are in dire need or in poor health. When I was growing up my parents paid for most things and gave me an allowance. But as soon as I moved out at 18, I never got another dime. I never asked and they never offered. It just never occurred to me to ever expect it. When times were tough, I worked extra pt. time jobs at night. Everything my husband and I have, we've earned completely on our own. No monetary gifts either at Christmas. It does give you a sense of pride to be able to do it on your own. I am shocked to hear how many of my friends whose parents have given them the down payments for their homes or given them the new car for their 40th b.d.

i'm working this all wrong - i bought my own car for my 40th !

i'm working this all wrong - i bought my own car for my 40th !

No kidding!

We've all been guilty of this. That's what's so ironic about some of the moralistic posts to this thread. ;-)
Don't we all wish we could be the perfect parent? It is so hard. There is a reason, for me anyway, for only having one child!

I have one child also. And still trying to figure it all out. I won't ever be a perfect parent, just want my son to be a good person who is respectful, appreciative, aware, kind and loving. Sometimes we need to work on ourselves in these very areas before we can even begin to teach our children. Thanks for sharing your stories!

Our son's school has some pretty good statements that define their mission. I feel these are so important as we think of what kind of people our children will grow to be:

Our mission. To awaken and nurture an endless passion for knowledge within our children.

Our vision for the child. To see each child grow to become global citizens who are wise, respectful, confident, compassionate, self-motivated, self-disciplined, independent thinkers, life-long learners, nurturing, tolerant, peaceful and skilled problem solvers.

Our vision for the world. Through the education of our children, SWMA aspires to help create an outstanding world community that is peaceful, compassionate, environmentally conscious, educated, spiritual, boundless, joyful, empathetic, balanced, and charitable.

I have one child also. And still trying to figure it all out. I won't ever be a perfect parent, just want my son to be a good person who is respectful, appreciative, aware, kind and loving. Sometimes we need to work on ourselves in these very areas before we can even begin to teach our children. Thanks for sharing your stories!

Our son's school has some pretty good statements that define their mission. I feel these are so important as we think of what kind of people our children will grow to be:

Our mission. To awaken and nurture an endless passion for knowledge within our children.

Our vision for the child. To see each child grow to become global citizens who are wise, respectful, confident, compassionate, self-motivated, self-disciplined, independent thinkers, life-long learners, nurturing, tolerant, peaceful and skilled problem solvers.

Our vision for the world. Through the education of our children, SWMA aspires to help create an outstanding world community that is peaceful, compassionate, environmentally conscious, educated, spiritual, boundless, joyful, empathetic, balanced, and charitable.

May I go to school with Spidey? I like what they're saying here. :clap_1:

JohnRudy, parenting is hard, isn?t it? You, like I, have an only child, and having only one makes it a bit easier to hand over money, that is one reason this issue has just now hit you. Your son makes good grades, he is involved in extracurricular activities, and stays out of trouble, what more can a parent ask for out of their 15-year-old? This is the summer that you realize you have a son that is growing up. Next year will be different; he will find a couple of jobs along the way that will give him some spending money, which will make you both feel better. As far as school lunch money, I would never dream of making my kid pay for a school lunch.

HOWEVER, what do I know; today is my son?s first day of college. This is a whole new set of questions.

May I go to school with Spidey? I like what they're saying here. :clap_1:

educational philosophy for the achievement of world peace. pretty neat, huh? and someday, I believe possible. only through education (and not just at school).

JohnRudy, parenting is hard, isn?t it? You, like I, have an only child, and having only one makes it a bit easier to hand over money, that is one reason this issue has just now hit you. Your son makes good grades, he is involved in extracurricular activities, and stays out of trouble, what more can a parent ask for out of their 15-year-old? This is the summer that you realize you have a son that is growing up. Next year will be different; he will find a couple of jobs along the way that will give him some spending money, which will make you both feel better. As far as school lunch money, I would never dream of making my kid pay for a school lunch.


HOWEVER, what do I know; today is my son?s first day of college. This is a whole new set of questions.

I hadn't thought about this before, but I completely agree with you on this!

Our mission. To awaken and nurture an endless passion for knowledge within our children.

Our vision for the child. To see each child grow to become global citizens who are wise, respectful, confident, compassionate, self-motivated, self-disciplined, independent thinkers, life-long learners, nurturing, tolerant, peaceful and skilled problem solvers.

Our vision for the world. Through the education of our children, SWMA aspires to help create an outstanding world community that is peaceful, compassionate, environmentally conscious, educated, spiritual, boundless, joyful, empathetic, balanced, and charitable.



[/quote]

Love this mission statement and have printed it out for our refrigerator door.

And as far as the lunch $$ combined with the spending $$ - - we're already vacillating on that one. Mr. Johnrudy is thinking poor nutritional (aka cheap) choices will be made in order to save $$ to be spent elsewhere. So, we're still investigating our options.

(Also, he has always had to take a 1/4 of any $$ he receives as gifts and deposit it in a college fund along with a small church/mission tithing. Sometimes he does it willingly, sometimes he gripes.)

Our mission. To awaken and nurture an endless passion for knowledge within our children.

Our vision for the child. To see each child grow to become global citizens who are wise, respectful, confident, compassionate, self-motivated, self-disciplined, independent thinkers, life-long learners, nurturing, tolerant, peaceful and skilled problem solvers.

Our vision for the world. Through the education of our children, SWMA aspires to help create an outstanding world community that is peaceful, compassionate, environmentally conscious, educated, spiritual, boundless, joyful, empathetic, balanced, and charitable.

Love this mission statement and have printed it out for our refrigerator door.

And as far as the lunch $$ combined with the spending $$ - - we're already vacillating on that one. Mr. Johnrudy is thinking poor nutritional (aka cheap) choices will be made in order to save $$ to be spent elsewhere. So, we're still investigating our options.

(Also, he has always had to take a 1/4 of any $$ he receives as gifts and deposit it in a college fund along with a small church/mission tithing. Sometimes he does it willingly, sometimes he gripes.)[/QUOTE]

You'll find what works best for you. Seems like he's already well on the right path without any of our advice. You should be proud. Carry on...