Note: This is satirical and I am not trying to offend anyone working the "real" twelve step program.
12 Step Program for Addicts of SoWal.com
Step 1
We admitted we were powerless over our addiction. That at any given hour of the day or night, we had to hit that “new post” button to see what we might have missed.
Step 2
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity and bring us back to our “real” world and out of our “virtual” world.
Step 3
Made a decision to turn our lives over to our Higher Power so that we could actually get some work done at work, or clean our nasty houses that we have put off cleaning, because we couldn’t stop SoWalling.
Step 4
Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves, because our morality has been shaken due to the Smokin’, Drinkin’, Cussin’, Soiree’s, that have taken place.
Step 5
Admitted to our Higher Power, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of SoWal.com and what it does to make us powerless to get anything else in our lives accomplished.
Step 6
We’re entirely ready to have our Higher Power remove all these defects of character so that we can get back to our regularly scheduled lives.
Step 7
Humbly asked our Higher Power to remove our shortcomings and our unbridled passion for SoWal.com.
Step 8
Made a list of all persons we had “banned” and became willing to make amends to them all.
Step 9
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except if it meant driving to the state of Tennessee to do so.
Step 10
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it, especially if we gave a bad review of a restaurant in SoWal that someone else actually loves.
Step 11
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power to help us “just say no” when we wanted to go into our computer room’s and post just one more post. When our kids were screaming they were hungry, when are pet’s wanted to be let out to tinkle, when our significant other’s pleaded for us to come to bed, when we were posting with just one eye open because we were nodding off at the computer, because we were waiting for that one reply from a post we wanted to see.
Step 12
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we all threw our computers out the windows because as we saw it, if we couldn’t SoWal.com, what the hell did we need computers for anyway.
12 Step Program for Addicts of SoWal.com
Step 1
We admitted we were powerless over our addiction. That at any given hour of the day or night, we had to hit that “new post” button to see what we might have missed.
Step 2
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity and bring us back to our “real” world and out of our “virtual” world.
Step 3
Made a decision to turn our lives over to our Higher Power so that we could actually get some work done at work, or clean our nasty houses that we have put off cleaning, because we couldn’t stop SoWalling.
Step 4
Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves, because our morality has been shaken due to the Smokin’, Drinkin’, Cussin’, Soiree’s, that have taken place.
Step 5
Admitted to our Higher Power, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of SoWal.com and what it does to make us powerless to get anything else in our lives accomplished.
Step 6
We’re entirely ready to have our Higher Power remove all these defects of character so that we can get back to our regularly scheduled lives.
Step 7
Humbly asked our Higher Power to remove our shortcomings and our unbridled passion for SoWal.com.
Step 8
Made a list of all persons we had “banned” and became willing to make amends to them all.
Step 9
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except if it meant driving to the state of Tennessee to do so.
Step 10
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it, especially if we gave a bad review of a restaurant in SoWal that someone else actually loves.
Step 11
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power to help us “just say no” when we wanted to go into our computer room’s and post just one more post. When our kids were screaming they were hungry, when are pet’s wanted to be let out to tinkle, when our significant other’s pleaded for us to come to bed, when we were posting with just one eye open because we were nodding off at the computer, because we were waiting for that one reply from a post we wanted to see.
Step 12
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we all threw our computers out the windows because as we saw it, if we couldn’t SoWal.com, what the hell did we need computers for anyway.
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:rofl: I just SoWaled my car. My family was shocked