I think there a quite a few of us on the board, so I thought I would share a couple of things with you guys.
A DOG'S PRAYER
by Beth Norman Harris
Treat me kindly, my beloved master, for no heart in all the world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.
Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I should lick your hand between the blows, your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me the things you would have me do.
Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footstep falls upon my waiting ear.
When it is cold and wet, please take me inside, for I am now a domesticated animal, no longer used to bitter elements. And I ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting at your feet beside the hearth. Though had you no home, I would rather follow you through ice and snow than rest upon the softest pillow in the warmest home in all the land, for you are my god and I am your devoted worshipper.
Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although I should not reproach you were it dry, I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.
Feed me clean food, that I may stay well, to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side, and stand ready to protect you with my life should your life be in danger.
And, beloved master, should the great Master see fit to deprive me of my health or sight, do not turn me away from you. Rather hold me gently in your arms as skilled hands grant me the merciful boon of eternal rest ---- and I will leave you knowing with the last breath I drew, my fate was ever safest in your hands.
Letters to GOD from Dogs:
Dear God, When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?
Dear God, Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed can't have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!
Dear God, If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, does he still get his ass whacked with a newspaper?
Dear God, Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?
Dear God, If we come back as humans, is that good, or bad?
Dear God, More meatballs, less spaghetti.
Dear God, When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to do that stupid shake hands trick to get in?
Dear God, We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God, Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone? I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear back is the horny beagle across the street.
Dear God, Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize to them?
Dear God, Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants because we can't make up our minds what NOT to order? Or is it the accident on the carpet thing, again?
A DOG'S PRAYER
by Beth Norman Harris
Treat me kindly, my beloved master, for no heart in all the world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.
Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I should lick your hand between the blows, your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me the things you would have me do.
Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footstep falls upon my waiting ear.
When it is cold and wet, please take me inside, for I am now a domesticated animal, no longer used to bitter elements. And I ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting at your feet beside the hearth. Though had you no home, I would rather follow you through ice and snow than rest upon the softest pillow in the warmest home in all the land, for you are my god and I am your devoted worshipper.
Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although I should not reproach you were it dry, I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst.
Feed me clean food, that I may stay well, to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side, and stand ready to protect you with my life should your life be in danger.
And, beloved master, should the great Master see fit to deprive me of my health or sight, do not turn me away from you. Rather hold me gently in your arms as skilled hands grant me the merciful boon of eternal rest ---- and I will leave you knowing with the last breath I drew, my fate was ever safest in your hands.
Letters to GOD from Dogs:
Dear God, When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?
Dear God, Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed can't have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!
Dear God, If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, does he still get his ass whacked with a newspaper?
Dear God, Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?
Dear God, If we come back as humans, is that good, or bad?
Dear God, More meatballs, less spaghetti.
Dear God, When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to do that stupid shake hands trick to get in?
Dear God, We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God, Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone? I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear back is the horny beagle across the street.
Dear God, Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize to them?
Dear God, Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants because we can't make up our minds what NOT to order? Or is it the accident on the carpet thing, again?
