Looking for Sugar Momma

[mikecat adjuster]

I've decided to advertise. I'm looking for a Sugar Momma here along the beautiful Emerald Coast. Ideally, she will be between the age of 21 and 60 and be well kept. I need someone kind and even tempered and who doesn't expect too, too much in way of my housework. Oh, and someone who doesn't bark orders. I need to be respected.

I will clean and cook, and yes, I will wear a costume if that's her thing (But no pictures) I'm looking for this to possibly be a live in situation, but if not, we will need to consider a higher salary to cover my rent.

As stated, I will cook, but I'd prefer eating out or take out at least several times a week. After sampling my culinary skills, and limited offerings, I'm sure that will be a mutual desire. (And yes, I'll drive to pick up the take out)

To be sure I stay in good shape for her viewing pleasure and for certain performance issues, I'll require a gym membership and the understanding that I venture out and kayak and run trails etc. fairly often.

I will strike poses at dinner parties and allow limited groping from her friends, but it must be done so in a discrete manner.

I would like to be insured comensurate with industry standards. (Medical and dental)

And most importantly, on nights when LSU plays, I get the remote.

Further details can be discussed in private. I can assure any applicant, you will not be disappointed with my experience or my level of intimacy.

 

[aggieb]

you can't be serious?

 

[Smiling JOe]

lol.


...and if there is a second sugar momma who gets beat to the punch, let me know. I'll see what I can work out.

 

[Scooter]

Very tempting if I weren't married! On Saints nights (like tonight) I'd have to get the remote!

 

[sunspotbaby]

a shugga momma don't live with ya, Mike. Careful what you ask for!

Lonely snowbirds are always trying to take my husband home for the summer.

....."go ahead Babe, we need the money!" :roll:

 

[scooterbug44]

You don't cook and want to hog the remote during football games ........... and in return you want a gym membership, full medical and dental, respect and RENT?

Waiter, one order of reality for Mike please! :roll:

 

[sunspotbaby]

You don't cook and want to hog the remote during football games ........... and in return you want a gym membership, full medical and dental, respect and RENT?

Waiter, one order of reality for Mike please! :roll:

:funn:

 

[Teresa Cline]

DREAM ON BABY.....AINT GONNA HAPPEN!

 

[mikecat adjuster]

If it's the age thing that's an issue, I can always go up beyond 60. (But no bed pans though) I know that the snowbirds are coming later this year and I'll be ready. I still have a shirt that I wear from the Reagan era (first term) which might appeal to their nostalic nature.

We'll see. You guys might be right about asking for a lot. I actually kinda thought I left out a few things to be negotiated in the interview. But with the economy, perhaps you have a point.

I'd appreciate any help concerning this issue. I know I have a lot to offer and am willing to learn on the job regarding any 'old school' techniques needed to get the job done properly. I have a sofa I could throw in too and some other nice furniture.

Well, I'll be doing my sit-ups. Until then, muah!

 

[Matt J]

I hate to bring up the issue of age, but aren't you a little old for a sugar momma/cougar?