Dating

[Carol G]

What do all of you think of the old-fashioned notion of courting? It seems to me that group dating and socializing truly is a safe, effective way of getting to know someone.

This basically describes dating at my college - so great and I REALLY miss it! (well, that and the giant pool of eligible men w/ good teeth)

It is also why I am so bad at "dating" - I never actually "dated" before I was 21 - you just had a giant coed group of friends/acquaintances (usually anchored by one relationship) that hung out and paired off every so often.

Totally agree... I always prefer to meet someone within a group of people and get to know him as a friend first. No pressure, and hopefully lots of fun & laughter. Then if there's chemistry and mutual attraction, it becomes apparent and you go on a "real" date.

Unfortunately, in today's world often the only group situations we find ourselves in are work-related, so that rule about not dating co-workers gets broken a lot.

 

[maeby funke]

This basically describes dating at my college - so great and I REALLY miss it! (well, that and the giant pool of eligible men w/ good teeth)

It is also why I am so bad at "dating" - I never actually "dated" before I was 21 - you just had a giant coed group of friends/acquaintances (usually anchored by one relationship) that hung out and paired off every so often.

I thinks it's a great idea. I become shy, and a bit withdrawn, when I'm one-on-one with a man I don't know very well. Meeting someone while surrounded by people I trust and am comfortable with would be sooo much better.

 

[scooterbug44]

I become shy, and a bit withdrawn, when I'm one-on-one with a man I don't know very well.

Ditto, which is crazy because very few people meeting me in a non-date situation would describe me as shy or tongue tied! I could address a crowd of 500, but get me on a date and my IQ drops about 100 pts - blithering idiot would be a kind description of some of my verbal oopsies!

 

[Carol G]

Ditto, which is crazy because very few people meeting me in a non-date situation would describe me as shy or tongue tied! I could address a crowd of 500, but get me on a date and my IQ drops about 100 pts - blithering idiot would be a kind description of some of my verbal oopsies!

:funn:I resemble that remark!

 

[John R]

blithering idiot i have not been called. idiot, phucking idiot...

 

[NoHall]

I thinks it's a great idea. I become shy, and a bit withdrawn, when I'm one-on-one with a man I don't know very well. Meeting someone while surrounded by people I trust and am comfortable with would be sooo much better.

blithering idiot i have not been called. idiot, phucking idiot...

That's what I was thinking, too--I told this guy that on Saturday I felt comfortable with my friends there, but one on one with a stranger I felt like I was at an interview for a job I 1) knew nothing about and 2) wasn't sure I really wanted.

Oh, John R...you're not an idiot. But I've heard lots of other names for you! (All given with great affection.)

 

[John R]

 

[NoHall]

That's beautiful...

 

[scooterbug44]

I really don't understand stalking!

Why would you put so much time and effort into someone who doesn't want you?

 

[Alicia Leonard]

I really don't understand stalking!

Why would you put so much time and effort into someone who doesn't want you?

It's about control as well as delusional psychosis. Most stalkers have personality disorders to start with and becoming overly possessive after a first date is a major red flag. Moving too fast is another and thats why my bells went off after reading NoHalls post.

Someone earlier said something about trusting your gut and I firmly believe in it. I also have a friend who imparted a little wisdom to me after he worked as an assistant District Attorney in New York and New Orleans. He said, "Be careful AL, anyone can pretend to be normal for six months, after that, you start seeing the real person."