Dating

[Carol G]

Now that's some stalking skills. :funn:

Don't I know it! A single girl's gotta learn a few tricks to survive in this world, it can be brutal out there!

I have a few more tricks I can teach you if'n you're nice to me. Who needs a private detective anyway, just leave it to a scorpio to find whatever dirt might be hiding...

 

[Matt J]

Don't I know it! A single girl's gotta learn a few tricks to survive in this world, it can be brutal out there!

I have a few more tricks I can teach you if'n you're nice to me. Who needs a private detective anyway, just leave it to a scorpio to find whatever dirt might be hiding...

We can get together for coffee and exchange stalking tips. :funn: The first meeting of the SoWal Stalkers Coffee Clutch.

 

[NoHall]

K, I've been lurking on this thread, enjoying myself and wondering if I'd get up the nerve to jump in and tell some of my oh-so-fun dating war stories, but I gotta say, after your past few posts NoHall, as your newest BFF, this guy is totally creeping me out!!!

Go with your instincts on this one, because if you just laid eyes on him a few weeks ago, and he already knows all this stuff about you, AND he's making future plans without your consent, AND he's calling you at 10:30 pm AFTER you've told him not to, he's crossed WAY too many boundaries for my taste. Maybe he is just a nice lonely guy with poor social skills... but ya know, if he's that clueless at his age, and can't/won't listen to your wishes & desires this early on, then where do you go from here??? Reasonable, mature people just don't play that way...

And do yourself a favor... go to Intelius.com, plug in his name and find out the cities he's lived in, if you can (the initial free search.) Then google the county websites for those cities, and look up his name in the court records search. You can find out all kinds of interesting information, for free, like if he's ever been convicted of a felony. Then you'll know stuff about him too...

Not that I have any experience with this sort of thing.

Don't I know it! A single girl's gotta learn a few tricks to survive in this world, it can be brutal out there!

I have a few more tricks I can teach you if'n you're nice to me. Who needs a private detective anyway, just leave it to a scorpio to find whatever dirt might be hiding...

Ooh! I'm on it--thanks! The good news is that we have to go through pretty intense background checks where I work, so I'm pretty sure he's clean as far as that goes. But I think you're probably right about the "socially awkward" thing.

Jeez...two more emails from him this morning...

 

[John R]

can't believe i'm dropping in to this thread.

1. don't date people at work. 99% of the time it never works out.
2. this chucklehead is making future plans regarding you after one date?? run the other way.
3. based on #2. do NOT respond to him any more. you've indicated how you feel. nothing more is required.


two more emails this am?? inform your superior so you have this behavior on record. do not respond.

 

[Alicia Leonard]

We can get together for coffee and exchange stalking tips. :funn: The first meeting of the SoWal Stalkers Coffee Clutch.

 

[Cheering472]

We can get together for coffee and exchange stalking tips. :funn: The first meeting of the SoWal Stalkers Coffee Clutch.

I'll see you there, but you won't see me. ;-)

 

[NoHall]

can't believe i'm dropping in to this thread.

1. don't date people at work. 99% of the time it never works out.
2. this chucklehead is making future plans regarding you after one date?? run the other way.
3. based on #2. do NOT respond to him any more. you've indicated how you feel. nothing more is required.


two more emails this am?? inform your superior so you have this behavior on record. do not respond.

This is why I love you folks. The depth of wisdom here is wonderful, and the tough love makes my heart happy!

Make that 3 more emails. My boss knows (and is profoundly embarrassed to have set us up.) He said that I have been too nice and no longer have to be--he said to send the "don't call us; we'll call you" email, pointing out that he stepped across some clear boundaries. I just sent that email, and made it clear that it would be my last (and that I expect no more calls or emails from him.)

 

[scooterbug44]

That guy is an overly possessive psycho!!! He can't even SEE the line, he crossed it so long ago!

IMMEDIATELY inform your boss and the Sowal Enforcers if he contacts you again! :angry:

 

[NoHall]

Breaking up is hard to do...

That guy is an overly possessive psycho!!! He can't even SEE the line, he crossed it so long ago!

IMMEDIATELY inform your boss and the Sowal Enforcers if he contacts you again! :angry:

Breathe a collective sigh of relief...I believe the drama has ended. He thanked me for my honesty, apologized for stepping over the boundaries, and promised to respect my wishes that he not call or email me anymore. I will not respond to that email, but when I blew him off I did wish him well and express my hope that some dear girl will appreciate all his kindness someday.

Obviously, this dating thread turned into TMI about a page ago, but I hope we (and by "we" I am speaking for myself) have learned a lot from this experience. Thank you all for being a sounding board.

Can I change the subject slightly? What do all of you think of the old-fashioned notion of courting? It seems to me that group dating and socializing truly is a safe, effective way of getting to know someone.

 

[scooterbug44]

What do all of you think of the old-fashioned notion of courting? It seems to me that group dating and socializing truly is a safe, effective way of getting to know someone.

This basically describes dating at my college - so great and I REALLY miss it! (well, that and the giant pool of eligible men w/ good teeth)

It is also why I am so bad at "dating" - I never actually "dated" before I was 21 - you just had a giant coed group of friends/acquaintances (usually anchored by one relationship) that hung out and paired off every so often.