kurt, Smiling JOe, Moondance....

[Smiling JOe]

I fully support drinking on the job. Everyone would show up for work if you could drink while you work.

Maybe, drinking on the job should be allowed on:
Mondays to get employees through the day.

Tuesdays for the hair of the dog that bit the employees.

Wednesdays to get over the hump.

Thursdays because it would be the only day without drinking on the job, otherwise.

Fridays because it is PayDay and everyone would go home to drink otherwise.

Saturdays because it is Saturday and employees have to work.

Sundays because employees only occasionally show up when they have to work on Sunday; and, see Tuesdays

 

[Smiling JOe]

Ok, I will tell them that SJ said I could drink on the job, and if I get fired, then I can come down there permantely. I guess I would be homeless though, but homeless at the beach couldn't be all that bad, could it?

Homeless at the Beach?

Remedy: Sleep on the Beach in the day time. Watch the stars at night. You can stay out on the beach all night, just no camping/sleeping.

 

[kathydwells]

Homeless at the Beach?

Remedy: Sleep on the Beach in the day time. Watch the stars at night. You can stay out on the beach all night, just no camping/sleeping.

Well, alrighty then, it is settled. I will get myself fired for drinking on the job. Then I am coming down to sleep on the beach during the day and star gaze at night. YEAH!!!!!

 

[ktschris]

I don't think this is too off thread....

Plus, I won't be able to post a friday funny (off tomorrow) so technically today is my friday....

20 Ways For Women To Tell That They've Had A Little Much To Drink

1. I have absolutely no idea where my purse is.

2. I believe that dancing with my arms overhead and wiggling my butt while yelling "WOO-HOO!" is truly the sexiest dance move around.

3. I've suddenly decided I want to kick someone's ass and honestly believe I could do it too.

4. In my last trip to pee, I realize I now look more like a homeless hooker than the goddess I was just four hours ago.

5. I drop my 3:00 a.m. submarine on the floor (which I'm eating even though I'm not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it.

6. I start crying and telling everyone I see that I love them sooooo much.

7. I get extremely excited and jump up and down every time a new song plays because "Oh my God! I love this song!"

8. I've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.

9. The man I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher.

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing or dance becomes strangely overwhelming.

11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.

12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.

13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me just lemonade, but that's just because I can no longer taste the gin.

14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the kitchen floor.

15. I start every conversation with a booming, "DON'T take this the WRONG WAY but..."

16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it.

17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.

18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor (wherever I happen to be standing) and take a quick nap.

19. I begin leaving the buttons open on my button fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the bathroom away from my drink.

20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight.

 

[kathydwells]

ktschris, have you been spying on me?

 

[Landlocked]

Well, alrighty then, it is settled. I will get myself fired for drinking on the job. Then I am coming down to sleep on the beach during the day and star gaze at night. YEAH!!!!!

You could draw unemployment!

 

[kathydwells]

You could draw unemployment!

Yes, and that would probably only buy me my favorite beverage for the day. Guess I would have to eat from the beach, maybe you guys could leave me some Cheezits!!!!

 

[Landlocked]

Yes, and that would probably only buy me my favorite beverage for the day. Guess I would have to eat from the beach, maybe you guys could leave me some Cheezits!!!!

You could build yourself a nice beach shack from storm debris and rent chairs and umbrellas for a living. That's not looking too bad for me at this point.

How much gas is in my truck?? Can I make it?

 

[kathydwells]

You could build yourself a nice beach shack from storm debris and rent chairs and umbrellas for a living. That's not looking too bad for me at this point.

How much gas is in my truck?? Can I make it?

I got a full tank...I know, we can go into business together!! I will rent the chairs and umbrellas, and you could set you up a little bar and be the cabana boy!!! It is looking better by the minute.

 

[Landlocked]

I got a full tank...I know, we can go into business together!! I will rent the chairs and umbrellas, and you could set you up a little bar and be the cabana boy!!! It is looking better by the minute.

I've got about a hundred surf fishing rods we could rent out too!